WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jan 20, 2011 17:54:57 GMT -8
Reposting this little work in progress. In the process of writing it, I'm having just as much fun writing the music as the screenplay, so I'm planning to save the screenplay as a slightly longer-term project and crank out an album or two first, which requires a little less money on my part and can help build interest in the project before going into pre-production.
Bone Daddy and the Skeleton Crew Action/Comedy A loser horror rock band who moonlight as loser superheroes must stop the evil Dr. von Skull from using a theme park as the launching ground for his doomsday machine.
Characters
Bone Daddy AKA: Robert "Bob" Panek Instrument: Vocals Powers: Shadow-based. Bob has the ability to turn invisible for up to 15 seconds at a time, or indefinitely if completely surrounded by shadows. He also has the ability to teleport himself through shadows up to a range of 50 feet by leaping into one and out of another. Appearance: Bob looks like a cross between Michale Graves, King Diamond, and Alice Cooper. He wears ghoulish facepaint and dresses in black with a skeleton motif to his clothes. He always wears a pair of shadeacles a la Ozzy Osbourne or Geddy Lee and alternates between a fedora and a top hat. He sports long hair and a goatee. Personality: Bob is the de facto leader of the group, which is odd because of how little he speaks. Despite being the frontman of the band, his preferred method of communication is what his comrades refer to as "the complex and subtle language of Man-Grunt." He very rarely uses complete sentences, using monosyllabic words and indistinct grunts and vocalizations instead. Despite this, men seem to understand exactly what he's saying. Bob is very blase about everything, rarely showing any sign of being perturbed or distressed. What some see as apathy is simply a cultivated reticence he's built up in order to keep a cool head under pressure.
Jackie Strange AKA: Jack Anderson Instrument: Guitar Powers: Jack is a master martial artist, but his real power comes from the way his body handles alcohol. As he becomes more intoxicted, it actually increases his strength and speed and sharpens his reaction time. The drawback is that his body otherwise handles alcohol the same and after a point he becomes too drunk to fight. Appearance: Jack is a strapping young man with a forked beard and long hair. His trademark is his beat up old denim jacket with numerous patches and rips in it. He typically wears fatigues and combat boots for mobility when fighting. Personality: Jack is a functioning alcoholic, almost perpetually tipsy. His constant state of inebriation makes him affable and good-humored in contrast to his otherwise menacing appearance. As the oldest member of the band/team he sometimes takes on a paternal role, mediating arguments and keeping order beside Bob.
I.M. Wolfman AKA: Lon "Lonny" Browning Instrument: Bass Powers: Lonny is a werewolf, though unable to affect a full transformation. When at the peak of his transformation, he is phenomenally strong, able to deadlift half a ton and possessing a vertical leap of 7 feet. He also becomes very fast, able to run at a top speed of approximately 35 mph. Appearance: Lonny has the physique of a bodybuilder, but a bit of a baby face. He tries to compensate by growing a long goatee that he ties into a single braid that hangs over his chest. He dresses exclusively in T-shirts, cargo shorts/pants, and VFF shoes. On stage or on patrol he also wears leather cuffs around his wrists. His wardrobe is mostly muted colors of blue, grey and black and many of his outfits have an urban camo pattern. Personality: The bassist is often the most overlooked member of a rock band, and Lonny tries desperately to compensate with a brash and energetic demeanor. He's a live wire with boundless enthusiasm but becomes frustrated easily. He also has a habit of talking too much, shooting his mouth off constantly and peppering his speech with enough profanity to curl a sailor's pubes. Lonny's inferiority complex is joined at the hip with his ambition. He refuses to get a dayjob like the other bandmates, devoting all of his time to training and practicing his music. He's motivated and driven, but also self-sabotaging as he doesn't have a lot of self-respect. He sees himself as a failure and though desperate to shed that feeling he feels trapped by it, wondering if he's doomed to spend his life as a wannabe.
Sin AKA: Elizabeth "Beth" Browning Instrument: Keyboards Powers: Fire magic. Beth can create and manipulate fire, but once it's out of her grasp, physics tend to take over. This has made her numerous enemies among the city's volunteer fire departments. Appearance: Beth is a tall, attractive woman with a curvy figure, dark features, and very Gothy ensemble. She's fully decked out in spooky bling and plays the sexy superheroine image to the hilt. Personality: Beth, like her brother, is ambitious but easily frustrated. Rather than an inferiority complex, she expresses aggravation and exasperation with how unpractical the expectations of the public and the vigilante lifestyle are. She wants to be a femme fatale, but is also fully aware that it's hard to fight crime in heels and a bustier. Along similar lines, she frequently tries to use her "feminine charms" to get what she wants, but more often ends up coming across as drunk, insane or desperate. She's slowly coming to terms with the fact that even though she enjoys being a hero and a musician, the lifestyle is not nearly as glamorous as the movies make it out to be. Ironically, her efforts to live up to the archetypes deprive her of what she really wants: to be taken seriously.
Spooky AKA: Timothy "Tim" Petroski Instrument: Drums Powers: Telekinesis. Tim's TK power is not the dramatic kind of seen in the movies. He can only deadlift about 100 lbs if he has full concentration. Instead, he specializes in fine manipulation of objects. His most recent success is being able to pick locks with his mind. Appearance: Tim is an unassuming man with blond hair and a boyish face. His slicked back hair and attire give him the look of a 50's delinquent, though he also wears spiked armbands, chains, and ghostly facepaint. Personality: Tim is sarcastic, sardonic and dry-witted. He could see the dark side to a sunny meadow full of puppies and candy bars. Yet he shows enough tact that this quality never becomes grating. He's quiet until he has another of his wry remarks or observations to make and his comedic timing is enough to usually get a laugh out of people. Of all the band members, Tim is the one who just sort of fell into his role. Though he enjoys the music and the vigilante work, he came across it through sheer serendipity. This describes many of the things in his life. He's very reactionary, his entire decision-making process supremely fluid and passive. And though he has the aforementioned sardonic streak, he's very difficult to upset, rarely showing anything more than mild annoyance or distress. When he does become visibly rattled, that's a sure sign that the shit has hit the fan.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on May 20, 2011 21:15:06 GMT -8
I've begun considering using these characters as a comic, and thus have been adding some more depth to their personalities bit by bit.
A dynamic I came up with is that as a band, Bob is the driving force. Bone Daddy and the Skeleton Crew is his band. Jack on the other hand is the de facto leader of their vigilante activities. Though they're old friends, this is a point of friction between the two of them. Bob is calm, restrained and focused. Jack is more of a maverick, thinking on the fly and adapting quickly with little regard for order or structure. There's a bit of a Picard/Riker influence in there, I suppose.
Lonny and Beth also have a degree of sibling rivalry going. As the middle child of three, Lonny always feels like he's being compared to his big sister and their younger brother, Kurt. Beth for her part does care about him, but they still bicker and she frequently teases him. He usually reacts with profanity.
Tim is the band's gearhead. He's analytical and enjoys taking things apart and putting them back together, so he handles the band's gear and equipment. He has an interest in engineering as well, sometimes building ghetto robots on the cheap when he has the opportunity. This popped into my head as a sort of natural progression of the character when I thought of a scene of them discovering the plans of Dr. von Skull.
Beth: I've got something here. Manual, I think. Tim, what do you make of this? Tim: Pennrose tubes with alkaline coating... Mark IV parabolic endoscope... Interocitor with volterators incorporating an electron sorter... Would you guys mind if I crapped myself? Right here, right now? Lonny: Son of a bitch. Okay, so a dude with a German accent, a fuck-you mustache, and a monocle comes up to you and orders parts for a doomsday device. And you don't call the cops, because...? Tim: This isn't exactly Radio Shack standard, Lonny. (flipping through the manual) Most of this stuff is restricted. Some of it illegal. I can forgive you for not knowing this, but the black market isn't known for carding their customers. Lonny: Eat me. So, what now? Tim: Do you think the van can get us out of town by midnight? Because running away sounds good. Beth: Why midnight? Jack: Have you ever known a supervillain to set off his master plan any other time? Tim: I personally think it's some kind of genetic compulsion.
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Post by vampirekites on May 20, 2011 22:13:45 GMT -8
I'm joshin'. You had me at " loser horror rock band". You usually have very interesting and creative premises, so this sounds pretty solid.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on May 29, 2011 18:25:27 GMT -8
Okay, so a thought occurred to me. The villain I have in mind for the eventual screenplay is the mad scientist Dr. Volker von Skull. I imagine him as a cross between Gary Busey and Tony Robbins, a hellish ballbreaker of a boss who's obsessed with feel-good affirmations, self-help cliches, and New Age-y management techniques. He thinks that the things he's saying are deeply profound, but make no sense to anyone other than him.
A recent Cracked article came up that mentioned Hollywood keeps giving villains high culture interests and hobbies. Hannibal Lecter is an urbane gentleman with a love of classical music and aristocratic trappings. Al Capone in The Untouchables is portrayed as a lover of opera. Allan Rickman in Die Hard, the auction scene in North by Northwest, Leon the Professional, the list goes on. Since I want to take a scalpel to the tropes with this project (i.e. making the vocalist quiet and taciturn off-stage), I got to thinking about what kind of hobbies would a character like Dr. von Skull really have?
And the first thing that popped into my head is that he'd probably listen to music that contains the same feel-good messages he parrots on a regular basis. So I'm going to see if I can work in some references to him listening to Lady Gaga, Spandau Ballet, and similar artists.
Yes? No? Maybe?
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aeson
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Post by aeson on May 31, 2011 19:42:16 GMT -8
Okay, so a thought occurred to me. The villain I have in mind for the eventual screenplay is the mad scientist Dr. Volker von Skull. I imagine him as a cross between Gary Busey and Tony Robbins, a hellish ballbreaker of a boss who's obsessed with feel-good affirmations, self-help cliches, and New Age-y management techniques. He thinks that the things he's saying are deeply profound, but make no sense to anyone other than him. A recent Cracked article came up that mentioned Hollywood keeps giving villains high culture interests and hobbies. Hannibal Lecter is an urbane gentleman with a love of classical music and aristocratic trappings. Al Capone in The Untouchables is portrayed as a lover of opera. Allan Rickman in Die Hard, the auction scene in North by Northwest, Leon the Professional, the list goes on. Since I want to take a scalpel to the tropes with this project (i.e. making the vocalist quiet and taciturn off-stage), I got to thinking about what kind of hobbies would a character like Dr. von Skull really have? And the first thing that popped into my head is that he'd probably listen to music that contains the same feel-good messages he parrots on a regular basis. So I'm going to see if I can work in some references to him listening to Lady Gaga, Spandau Ballet, and similar artists. Yes? No? Maybe? I like the idea of having him have painfully lowbrow hobbies and interests, like an obsession with viral internet clips or cooking junk food. When anyone(particularly an employee) points this out, he should go on a nonsensical rant about how a cat falling into a box reflects on the philosophical implications of the violence man commits upon man... or something. Not necessarily to chide the person in question, but more because he's partially insane and honestly believes the drivel he's spewing.
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Post by vampirekites on May 31, 2011 22:44:29 GMT -8
^Yeah, that's pretty good.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 1, 2011 15:54:03 GMT -8
I wouldn't want to make it lowbrow just for its own sake of course. Lady Gaga for example has that whole "believe in yourself" schtick that a self-help junkie like von Skull would be all over like stink on a monkey. Although I do like the idea of him making junk food sandwiches out of dingdongs, fruit rollups, and Hershey bars. Maybe burritos made out pancakes, Clark bars, honey roasted peanuts, and strawberry syrup. And justifying the whole thing with some kind of twisted dis-logic that you'd need a pound of weed to even begin to make sense of.
Anyway, I'm working on character designs some more and was watching Extra Credits on the Escapist when I realized I've really failed to give Beth some depth as a character. I intended her as a way to take apart a lot of female superhero tropes, but I think I've found a way to do so while simultaneously giving her more depth.
I envision Beth as a girl who grew up very artistic and talented but also very plain until puberty. She had to work for every second of attention she got. But when she started sporting cleavage and an hourglass figure she had the opposite problem. Now people pay attention to her, but it's mostly guys trying to get a peek down her shirt. Most of the feedback and attention she gets is bullshit, and she doesn't date much because she's almost hyper-critical both of herself and others meaning very few guys meet her standards. She likes her body, and she knows how to dress to play up her features, but she also resents the fact that now it's harder than ever to get people to take her seriously.
Yeah, she could just downplay the whole thing. Fight crime in a sports bra and practical clothing, stop wearing the Gothic femme fatale makeup, and generally try to make her looks a secondary concern. But she wants it both ways. She wants to be sexy and taken seriously at the same time despite the fact that societal expectations and stereotypes make that unreasonably difficult to do.
I like this idea so far, but I'd like some opinions from women. Is this a character concept that actually makes sense in the context of female psychology? Does this sound like a real person to you? Is this someone you could sympathize with or relate to or want to see them succeed? In short, does this idea work?
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shiko
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Post by shiko on Jun 1, 2011 15:59:32 GMT -8
This sounds so fucking awesome. That is all.
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Post by Alastor on Jun 1, 2011 18:25:33 GMT -8
This sounds so fucking awesome. That is all.
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Post by Hakujin [silentmoondemon] on Jun 2, 2011 15:51:01 GMT -8
Yeah, I think that your female character sounds pretty solid and realistic. It's almost impossible for girls to NOT want to be pretty due to all the importance society has put on looks, yet they know that looking good means that they have to try even harder to prove that they're not all looks. In fact, maybe your character could also worry about others doubting her intelligence simply for the fact that she's pretty. You know, the "you can't have both" rule.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 2, 2011 16:16:45 GMT -8
In fact, maybe your character could also worry about others doubting her intelligence simply for the fact that she's pretty. You know, the "you can't have both" rule. I had thought about that. There's also the fact that attractive people are given more lenience in general. People don't challenge them as often, they laugh at their unfunny jokes, they're more likely to give them favors. I imagine Beth as being a bit irritated when that happens. These people usually mean well and are trying to be nice, but she perceives it as patronizing even when that isn't the intention. She might even sometimes come across as a bitch because now she just cynically believes that any compliment she receives is just a meaningless knee-jerk reaction people have when they're within 10 yards of her boobs. This also gives a nice brother/sister dynamic between Lonny and Beth. They both want the same thing: for people to take them seriously. But they have different obstacles. Beth has to deal with the fact that people assume she's a slut or a bimbo because of her body. She wants to be sexy, but also wants to be recognized for the person she is under all the curves. Lonny on the other hand is a middle child of three who feels emasculated by the fact that he's a werewolf who can't fully transform. He isn't bad enough at what he does to be notable, nor is he good enough. Hence why he refuses to get a day job and spends all his time training as a fighter and musician. From there I see sort of a sibling rivalry between the two. Beth complains about all the schmucks who think she's dumb and easy, and Lonny retorts that it's a good problem to have compared to his constantly being overlooked. Lonny complains about how hard he works and gets no recognition for it, and Beth responds that she works hard too and just gets patronized as another pretty girl who took up the arts because she couldn't learn the skills for a real job. I love it when the characters start to come alive in my head like this.
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Post by Hakujin [silentmoondemon] on Jun 2, 2011 19:19:25 GMT -8
That...sounds totally awesome. The conflict between the siblings would create some nice drama - not too cheesy, not to...not cheesy- while at the same time allowing them to emotionally invest in those two as they slowly understand their personal struggles more and more.
But what about after the fighting and the bickering? Have you thought of the possibility of those two getting over their struggles and making nice-nice? Or are you going to continue to have them bicker, but in a more friendly way as the story progresses?
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 5, 2011 6:36:27 GMT -8
But what about after the fighting and the bickering? Have you thought of the possibility of those two getting over their struggles and making nice-nice? Or are you going to continue to have them bicker, but in a more friendly way as the story progresses? I figure it would progress from constantly sniping at each other to more like friendly ribbing. That's sort of how my brother and I progressed. We were at each other's throats for years. Now we just bust each other's balls in a friendly way.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 9, 2011 0:39:46 GMT -8
Funny image popped into my head and I'm inclined to make it a short once I get an actual cast together. Given that the band are all horror movie junkies, I got a scene in my head with them watching a movie at the theater and some douchebag starts texting in front of them. Tim uses his telekinesis to take the guy's phone, texts, "cock is delicious yum yum" to whoever the guy is talking to and tosses the phone back to him. The dude threatens them and Lonny just snarls and shows his yellow eyes and sharp teeth. Dude backs down instantly, meekly apologizing. Bob puts his hand to his forehead for the "loser" side and clicks his tongue at the guy with a smirk. Title cards come up:
"Be polite during the show." "You never know who you're going to piss off."
I don't know, maybe it's just my own revenge fantasy at work on this one.
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aeson
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Post by aeson on Jun 9, 2011 5:35:11 GMT -8
Funny image popped into my head and I'm inclined to make it a short once I get an actual cast together. Given that the band are all horror movie junkies, I got a scene in my head with them watching a movie at the theater and some douchebag starts texting in front of them. Tim uses his telekinesis to take the guy's phone, texts, "cock is delicious yum yum" to whoever the guy is talking to and tosses the phone back to him. The dude threatens them and Lonny just snarls and shows his yellow eyes and sharp teeth. Dude backs down instantly, meekly apologizing. Bob puts his hand to his forehead for the "loser" side and clicks his tongue at the guy with a smirk. Title cards come up: "Be polite during the show." "You never know who you're going to piss off." I don't know, maybe it's just my own revenge fantasy at work on this one. I think it'd be funnier if you extended it a bit by having the rude texter be von Skull, who then rambles something nonsensical and sics his minions on the gang - going with the whole 'Don't be rude lest you be punished' vibe.
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Post by Hakujin [silentmoondemon] on Jun 9, 2011 21:26:45 GMT -8
Funny image popped into my head and I'm inclined to make it a short once I get an actual cast together. Given that the band are all horror movie junkies, I got a scene in my head with them watching a movie at the theater and some douchebag starts texting in front of them. Tim uses his telekinesis to take the guy's phone, texts, "cock is delicious yum yum" to whoever the guy is talking to and tosses the phone back to him. The dude threatens them and Lonny just snarls and shows his yellow eyes and sharp teeth. Dude backs down instantly, meekly apologizing. Bob puts his hand to his forehead for the "loser" side and clicks his tongue at the guy with a smirk. Title cards come up: "Be polite during the show." "You never know who you're going to piss off." I don't know, maybe it's just my own revenge fantasy at work on this one. I think it'd be funnier if you extended it a bit by having the rude texter be von Skull, who then rambles something nonsensical and sics his minions on the gang - going with the whole 'Don't be rude lest you be punished' vibe. That actually could be the scene where the crew meets with the villain for the first time. Either way, the scene sounds great. Though I was expecting a bit more punishment for the rude texter...*sniff*
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 9, 2011 22:33:09 GMT -8
At this point, I'm just writing down any idea that pops into my head. Save it for later, modify it, whatever. I just let the ideas accumulate and keep the ones that work.
I have been thinking of putting some velvet Elvis paintings in von Skull's lair and having him refer to lolcats images as, "a testament to the folly of the autodidact."
Beyond that, I'm trying to get some more character development going. Again, whatever pops into my head. I got some inspiration for Lonny's dialog by watching The 100 Greatest Movie Threats of All Time, The 100 Greatest Movie Insults of All Time, and The Other 100 Greatest Movie Insults of All Time.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 14, 2011 11:24:31 GMT -8
Speaking up as another woman, I have to agree with what's been said. Women like feeling sexy, but we also want to be recognized for our abilities. It creates a strange paradox of hating cat-calls but still feeling sort of flattered, or envious if someone else is getting attention and we're not. Granted, this is just a general thing and there are plenty of women who are confident enough or who just don't care as much to not really be bothered by such things. For the average woman, such feelings are brief. However, when you really let it get into your head that you want the best of both worlds, you're never really satisfied. One question I have is if the other bandmates sometimes treat her as if her abilities don't matter in comparison to her body? Or do they honestly respect her, and she knows it? Either senario could make for funny comments about her boobs. My friend has huge boobs and they are always a source of humor for us. Another friend even gave them names, as if they really were separate living *things*. As far as Von Skull goes, the whole motivational music thing is a good idea, and it fits pretty well with Lady Gaga. Add in the fact that her videos are strange and I think you have a keeper. Much as it may be painful to your ears, the Disney Channel crap might also be a good thing to try. I've heard enough of it (thanks to my sister) that for some reason I can see Von Skull listening to 'Get Your Head in the Game' from High School Musical with some gusto. I think I mentioned this on the other board though, that you need to be careful to not make him too comical. Granted, this is a comedy, but you don't want him to be a silly cartoon villain either. (I think, at least) Typically as far as this guy goes, I think of this: Its funny, but it also talks quite frankly about hurting people with relish. Also, the one with the least development so far seems to be Jackie Strange. I get about how sometimes inspiration comes to you; trust me, when I was writing the first draft of my book one character had a single personality trait just so that I could work with him in the story. However, as I wrote about him his personality got a facelift and now he has two onion's worth of layers. You have a good thing going with Jackie, and something that may help is to think of some quirks. For example, a lot of people I know get philosophical when intoxicated, but at the same time when they stand up to go to the bathroom, they return a second later, having forgotten what they got up to do. Say Jackie is, I don't know, juggling, doesn't drop a single ball, but when asked what he wants to eat he's all "oh you know...the stuff. That's hot. And gooey." Am I making sense? Overall, I really like where this is going, and look forward to seeing this in my local movie store in a few years.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 14, 2011 17:03:40 GMT -8
One question I have is if the other bandmates sometimes treat her as if her abilities don't matter in comparison to her body? Or do they honestly respect her, and she knows it? Now that you bring it up, I imagine that Lonny just snipes at her in the usual sibling rivalry sort of way. Jack would tease her almost constantly. Bob is just as detached with her as he is with everyone else and Beth frequently ends up asking the others to translate Bob's grunting into plain English for her. Tim probably would make the most sarcastic quips at her expense. "If I wanted a joke, I'd watch you try to get free drinks at a bar." Very true. As I said, the goofiness is mostly the take a scalpel to the tropes of typical Hollywood villains. I still plan on including scenes of him displaying sociopathic tendencies. Point taken. I'm still working on it. I don't want him to be depressingly alcoholic, nor do I want him to be too goofy drunk. He's just a bit tipsy all the time. So I see him as being very mellow, tends to lose his train of thought a lot, that sort of thing.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jun 30, 2011 16:54:48 GMT -8
Okay, so I worked out a back story for Jack.
I envision him as having a rather archetypal broken home background. His parents divorced when he was young and he was constantly being shuttled back and forth between the two of them. They were still his parents, but he never really felt at home in either place. He took up martial arts to toughen himself up and give him a hobby. He spent many a weekend helping his dad tend his pot farm. It was his father's lifestyle that probably eventually influenced to Jack becoming a social drinker
In school, Jack was a career C-student. He wasn't awful, he just didn't do well within the school structure. He had a bit of a problem with authority as well and found himself in a lot of fights with other classmates, most of which he won by virtue of being one of the most athletic kids in his class. In high school, he was approached by a then-freshman Bob who said he wanted to learn how to fight so he could give as good as he got to his bullies. The two of them bonded over music and eventually hooked up with Tim to form the first incarnation of their band, The Lost Souls.
Jack never went to college and drifted from job to job before settling on a day job at a coffee shop that did little to reign in his behavior as the Bohemian clientele didn't give much of a care whether or not he was drunk or stoned, as long as he got their coffee right. His powers manifested around his 21st year and Tim began developing his own powers not long after. Bob dropped out of sight and went traveling across the country for a couple of years before returning with powers of his own and a determination to put the band back together. This time they called themselves The Maniacs. They went through a number of name changes as they played the clubs and bars including The Final Church, Ghost Train, Purple People Eaters, and Your Nemesis. They also adopted their stagenames and personas around this time before finally settling on being Bone Daddy and the Skeleton Crew.
Not long after, Jack's mother was burglarized. Though Jack was distant from his mother, it still bothered him on some level that the cops seemed powerless to do anything to help her. The burglar was eventually apprehended trying to fence some of her jewelry not by the police, but by a superpowered vigilante with a campy Latin lover gimmick named Senor Bigaton (literally "Mister Mustache"). At this point, Jack began to see the police as borderline useless. He realized that his problem with authority came from how utterly ineffectual it was more often than not. It gave him the inspiration to have the band use their powers to moonlight as superheroes, the people whom he perceived were actually making a difference. Bob was initially resistant to the idea, but his friendship with Jack eventually softened him to the idea. He was more interested in the band however, so Jack ended up taking the reigns as the leader of the Skeleton Crew's vigilante activities.
They hadn't been at this long before Bob got more ambitious with his songwriting and decided to hire two new members, one a full-time bassist so that he could concentrate on his singing. The Browning siblings got the job and the modern incarnation of the Skeleton Crew came to be. Jack sees in Lonny some of the traits of his teenage self and has passively taken the young lycanthrope under his wing. In trying to help Lonny, Jack is slowly becoming a more mature person himself.
Thoughts?
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shiko
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Post by shiko on Jun 30, 2011 17:18:13 GMT -8
I love all this, I'm can't wait to see this become offical![/green]
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jul 9, 2011 18:32:20 GMT -8
Draft of a scene that popped into my head.
The Skeleton Crew are loading their sound equipment into their van after a particularly disappointing bar gig. A mugger in a leather jacket comes up and pulls a gun on them.
MUGGER Alright, throw your wallets on the ground and lie down!
The band turn to look at him, unimpressed. Jack gives Bob a knowing look.
JACK Easy money.
LONNY Look motherfucker, I'm in kind of a bad mood right now, so you put that fuckin' gun away before I stick it up your ass.
Everyone gives Lonny slightly exasperated looks while Bob rolls his eyes and goes back to loading up the gear with a heavy sigh. The mugger looks confused.
TIM Lonny, chill. I got this.
Tim puts out a hand preparing to use his telekinesis, but Lonny pushes his hand back down.
LONNY No. I'll do it. I got a lot of frustration I need to work out right now and I can do it to this son of a bitch guilt free.
MUGGER The fuck are you talking about? Get down on the ground and give me your goddamn wallets!
LONNY Listen as hard as you can you ignorant, shit-eating dogfucker. I'm giving 3 goddamn seconds to put that gun on the ground and your hands in the air. If I get there, and you haven't done either, I'm going to tear your eyeballs out and piss in the sockets. I'll break your legs off and kick you in the ass with them. I'll rip your fucking head off... and stumpfuck your neck. One.
Lonny start walking over to the mugger. The band seem unconcerned.
MUGGER The hell is your problem? I'm not kidding, I will shoot you!
LONNY Two!
MUGGER I'm warning you!
LONNY Three!
Lonny is within only a few feet of the mugger when the gun goes off. Lonny doubles over clutching his chest. The mugger stands stunned. After a couple seconds, Lonny stands up straight again raving and stomping around in pain. The mugger just stnads there wide-eyed in disbelief.
LONNY Fuuuck!! Motherfucker! Jesus fucking cross-dressing crack-smoking Christ that fucking hurt! Son of a bitch god fucking damnit! Give me that!
Lonny snatches the gun off the mugger and pistol whips him unconscious. He empties the magazine out, drops the gun, and with a loud hiss of pain squeezes the bullet out of his chest and lets it clatter harmlessly to the ground.
LONNY The little bastard actually did it! Did he seriously think shooting me would have any positive result?!
BETH Hold still!
Beth inspects the wound.
BETH It's no worse than the time you broke your legs jumping off that roof. This will heal up in a week. Quit being a baby.
LONNY Fuck you! You try taking a bullet sometime! Sweet evil Satan this stings!
BETH Whatever, let's just haul the son of a bitch in, collect the bounty, and go home.
BOB Dude.
Lonny looks up to see Bob toss him a roll of gauze and a bottle of beer from inside the van both of which he easily catches.
BOB Cool?
LONNY (sigh) Yeah, I'm cool, I'll be fine.
Jack takes the handcuffs he had on his belt off and cuffs the mugger. Beth puts the gun in a bag while Jack and Tim haul the mugger into the van. Bob puts on a Misfits CD and they drive off to the sound of Fiend Club.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 12, 2011 11:36:21 GMT -8
^ I made my cat jump when I laughed at that. Anyway, this scene looks good. Nice set up to Lonny needing to prove himself, and the others being weary of his antics. Also the back story on Jackie was nice too.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Jul 21, 2011 21:51:45 GMT -8
I'm thinking more about the visuals as I plan on talking to some artists soon to do some Skeleton Crew comics. I was thinking of giving every character a color that features prominently in their wardrobe in order to balance out all the black that's going to be on display.
In Bob's case, I'm thinking purple. Purple shadeacles, maybe a purple T-shirt under his jacket, that sort of thing. For Jacky, I'm considering blue, mostly in the form of a beat-up denim jacket with band patches on it. Lonny is yellow. Beth is red. And Tim is white, going for kind of a classic 50's monochromatic look like Fonzie. I really want people to associate colors with the characters, but it's also motivated. You see the splashes of red in Beth's jewelry and think of fire. Purple and blue are generally worn by authority figures, so of course the de facto leaders of the group wear them.
Another thought that crossed my mind is giving Lonny the over-the-top cursing would be to tie things together by having his mother's half of the family be Romanian. His grandparents emigrated from Romania after WWII. This gives the whole Carpathian back story, but also allows me to use a few Romanian curses. If you haven't heard it, Romanian cursing is like mad-libs that hate you and were written by John Waters.
For example, when a villain starts monologuing, Lonny might interrupt him with an impatient retort of, "Go into the devil's cunt, scrotehead." Or if someone heckles the band on stage, he might toss off a threat of, "Brush your teeth. My dick will be inspecting soon," before starting the next song. He learned to curse from his grandparents, in other words.
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Aug 10, 2011 18:11:19 GMT -8
To flesh out the world a little more, I made a short list of other active heroes and villains in this alternate reality Pittsburgh:
Heroes and Heroines Senor Bigaton (Latin lover themed speedster) Professor Boom (steampunk themed hero) The Storm Ghost (one of my old City of Heroes characters actually, manipulates weather) The Gentleman (detective hero with perfect memory, doesn't like the Skeleton Crew) The Hell Patrol (team consisting of members Tritone, Iron Knightmare, Witch Hunter and Detonator) Lady Celestial (religious heroine with generic strength/speed/invulnerability/flight powers, she and Sin have an unpleasant history) Blue Lotus (psychic heroine who can create illusions and induce hallucinations in people, she and Bob dated for a few months in 2009)
Villains Oskorei (Norwegian super-powered terrorist last sighted in southwestern PA, been on the run for 6 years) The Mountebank (and his gang The Hooligans, rival of The Gentleman) Wild Side (former hero turned villain after he was arrested for physically abusing and torturing suspects) The Tribe (street gang with eclectic super powers, anarchist mindset) D.O.A. (former UFC competitor turned mercenary) Miss K (occultist and assassin, seems to have a personal interest in Lonny and has crossed paths with him several times)
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Post by WolfGod on Aug 19, 2011 20:15:57 GMT -8
EXT THUNDERBOLT QUEUE NIGHT Von Skull is standing at the entrance of the Thunderbolt with a remote in hand as the Skeleton Crew enter from around the bend. JACK That's far enough, baldy! Von Skull wheels around and smiles at them. VON SKULL I admit, I am surprised by your tenacity. Vell done. Unfortunately, it is too late. In 10 minutes, dis city vill mine. Tim steps forward and hold his hand out. He scowls and snarls, but his telekinesis isn't working. TIM Damn it, give me that thing in your hand! VON SKULL Ah, you are ze one called Spooky. I'm afraid your powers vill not vork. I put a kinetic disruptor shield in my belt before I came here. Beth pulls out a zippo and uses it to create a fireball, throwing it at Von Skull. He pulls a small canister out of his pocket and sprays a mist in front of himself that extinguishes her fireball on contact. VON SKULL (CONT) I sink not, young lady. Und Bone Daddy, before you try to teleport here... Von Skull snaps his fingers and a series of floodlights come on, making all the shadows too small or weak for Bob to teleport through. Bob looks around trying to find one usable shadow. BOB ... Fuck. VON SKULL As you can see, I am vell avare of your powers. And... limitations. Mister Strange, you von't be able to run here before I can escape. And Mister Volfman, my coat is threaded vis silver. It is a shame you are all such slaves of your limiting beliefs. You could have reframed my plan as an opportunity, rather zan an excuse to fight. You vere better off giving up. LONNY No. Fuck that. I've taken enough bullshit and I've had it. BETH Lonny, now isn't a good time. Lonny holds a hand out to silence Beth and steps forward. LONNY All my life I've been put down by people like you. Whether they're smarter than me or dumber than me, you always think you're better. Build your little ego fortresses and think you're safe from the barbarians. BETH Uh... what? LONNY Well now you've got bigger problems than barbarians. There's wolves at the gate. You can't hide in your ego fortress forever. Sooner or later, you gotta come out. I'm done hiding in mine. I'm done pretending I'm better than other people and not feeling it. Now I'm gonna prove it. I'm gonna throw open the gates and kick you in the ass with them on the way out. BETH Lonny? LONNY What makes the difference is not the strength of your ego, but the strength of your skills. The strength of your convictions. The strength of your accomplishments! TIM What the hell is he talking about? JACK I don't know, but let him go. He's on fire. LONNY And I'm about to write a new accomplishment for myself. Tonight the training pays off. The fighting pays off. Today is the day I open my gates... and storm yours! It's gonna be glorious. Everyone stands around in silence. Von Skull removes his pince-nez and begins a slow clap. VON SKULL Dat vas beautiful! I'm going to have to steal dat speech for my next motivational seminar. Lonny stares at Von Skull in disbelief. LONNY You... you dick! VON SKULL Oh, don't be so melodramatic. It vouldn't be ze first time I've stolen somesing. LONNY Not the speech, you cunt, I'm talking about... Oh, screw it. Forget the heroic speeches, I'm just gonna come over there and slap your accent out of your mouth. VON SKULL Und how do you propose to do zat? Lonny picks up some loose pebbles and chucks them at some of the floodlights, shattering them. Bob looks around and sees the shadows starting to form again. BOB (slowly with a shit-eating grin) Aawww yeah. Tim uses his telekinesis to gather and pitch more stones while Jack and Lonny start throwing more themselves. VON SKULL Hmm. Clever. But ze problem vis zat plan is- Von Skull turns on his heel and bolts, exiting the scene. LONNY Oh no, bitch. Not that easy. Lonny pitches one more rock, shattering a light opening up a shadow near where Von Skull was moments ago. Lonny grabs Bob's arm and the two of them jump into a shadow to teleport. Apologies for the crude formatting. Screenplay format doesn't copy from Word very well to message boards.
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Post by happytreefriends on Aug 19, 2011 23:59:52 GMT -8
D8 That's it?! You've got to continue!!
I can't wait to read more!
And don't you dare say you have writer's block. It doesn't exist!
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Aug 22, 2011 15:45:46 GMT -8
A random collection of scenes out of context that I somehow want to work into short videos or the comics:
-Lonny lounging in the living room playing bass. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic comes on and seemingly without realizing it, he starts playing the bass line to the theme song. -The band at a restaurant talking about the times they got their asses kicked. Tim is drinking hot sauce straight out of the bottle. -Beth and Lady Celestial sniping at each other. A lot and viciously. "Vow of celibacy? That's a cute euphemism for 'not enough beer in the world.'" -Lonny falls from a great distance, landing painfully. "I don't know what hurts worse: my pride or my ribs. (cracking sound as he tries to move, and his voice gets high and strained) My ribs. Definitely ribs. You guys... call an ambulance or something. I'm gonna try and... black out." -A female villain monologuing about how she's going to torment the captive Skeleton Crew. Tim responds, "Are you trying to give me a hard-on?" -A scene in a diner with the Skeleton Crew talking about the heroes and villains of the city, showing the vigilante career and community is somewhat insular (everyone knows everyone) and is riddled with petty personal politics like any other group.
I'm trying to keep the cynicism of the series to a minimum and go more for irony with a touch of the sardonic. I'm going to try and flesh out Tim better and then will post the remaining character back stories like I did Jack's earlier. Once that's done, I'll start scripting and storyboarding some ideas for the comics.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 29, 2011 23:47:59 GMT -8
First off, loving the scenes so far. They're quite funny, and they don't come across as very cynical to me. I like that the crew is able to outwit Von Skull using something as simple as rocks (which brings to mind something like 'Villains are mean. Throw rocks at them.' ) and the bit about Von Skull liking Lonny's speech was perfect for his whole 'motivational' thought process. Also its interesting to hear about other heroes in the city. Do you plan on having them interact a bit in the story? The colors bit is also good. I always like finding things like that in stories. Maybe for Von Skull he would wear ugly bright colors like Neon Green or something? Or at least things that clash horribly. Or else he would have a bunch of different costumes, all with different motivational quotes on them, from simple ones like 'if at first you don't succeed' to some complicated Winston Churchill quote. And maybe the lackey uniforms would all have a little smiley-face stitched on it somewhere. Also, sorry if I missed this, but what is the Thunderbolt? As far as Lonny's cussing goes, I like the idea, but a lot of people may miss the connection unless its explained properly. If you do the comic form like you're talking about you can always put it in the author's notes, but it might be good to mention it somehow in the story too. Overall, I like this a lot so far. Do you plan on drawing it, or are you collaborating? Will you post it online, or try and publish it first?
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WolfGod
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Post by WolfGod on Aug 30, 2011 6:46:13 GMT -8
Also its interesting to hear about other heroes in the city. Do you plan on having them interact a bit in the story? Yes. I wanted to do a short comic where The Gentleman chews them out for being wannabe heroes and Lonny starts begging the others to let him kick the guy's ass. "Come on, can't I just rip off one of his balls? Break his arm, maybe?" I also imagine the brief team-up with Lady Celestial going very badly as she and Sin don't stop sniping at each other. "Vow of celibacy. That's a cute euphemism for 'not enough beer in the world.'" "No, I'm just saving myself for marriage. I can see why you'd want to be a slut though. Eager to get a return on investment on those." (points to Beth's chest) "Oh ho no. These are all natural, honey." "Really? Well at least something about you is." I imagined him wearing T-shirts with awful slogans underneath his stereotypical lab coat. A rollercoaster in Kennywood Park, the theme park where von Skull is hiding his weapon. Naturally. Collaborating and it will be posted online. I'm going to try and get one issue of 2-5 pages up a month.
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