Vampires for a Men In Black fanfiction

[Madame Celeste]

I've been doing some development for a Men In Black vampire fic for some time, but I want to be sure that my vampires are a good fit for the MIB universe, so if anyone has any suggestions I would strongly appreciate them.

For the record, these are the details that I've agreed on so far regarding MIB vampires as a species:

SPOILER: Click to show

1) Vampirism on Earth first originated from an outbreak of an alien virus thousands of years ago, and the infected were physically mutated until they eventually became vampires.

2) These mutations are gradual as the infected person is slowly transformed, though the change is accelerated every time they drink human blood. (Alternatively, some vampires choose to consume human flesh instead of, or in addition to, human blood.) Outward symptoms of the virus include discoloration of the skin, protrusion of the teeth, and bloodshot eyes after feeding. In later years, some vampires would also willingly file their teeth to a sharp point, to make blood-drinking easier and also to intimidate their victims, hence the fangs of most pop culture vampires today.

3) The virus is spread by biting, or more specifically, by allowing the vampire's saliva to enter the victim's bloodstream. In most cases, however, multiple bites are needed to transform a victim, because the human immune system will eventually kill off the virus if given sufficient time. Because of this, when deliberately changing someone into a vampire, the vampire typically refrains as much as possible from drinking the person's blood, and some will even spit in or on the victim's wounds to speed up the process.

4) After the initial biting process, the new fledgling will begin gradually mutating into a vampire as described in #2. The MIB does have resources available to change a fledgling vampire back into a human, but to do this, a saliva sample from the maker(s) is needed in order to make an antidote. Once the transformation is complete, however, this antidote will no longer have any effect, and the fledgling will remain a vampire permanently.

5) Animals and certain alien races can potentially be infected, but such cases are extremely rare mainly because the vast majority of vampires were originally human, and vampires cannot metabolize blood or flesh that is different from that of their native species. (Any other species will make the vampire very sick.) Vampires generally do not eat other vampires, because their blood/flesh has less nutritional value to them due to the onset of the virus.

6) On the subject of weaknesses, a vampire's primary weakness is ultraviolet light, which will dry them out completely with sufficient exposure. (Hence why vampires cannot go out in the sun.) If injured, they can heal even from mortal wounds by consuming human blood and/or flesh, but if they are fatally injured and no blood or flesh is available, they cannot regenerate and will therefore die.

And over here is some info on vampires relative to the fic itself:

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1) First and foremost, the word "vampire" is equivalent to a racial slur as far as most vampires are concerned, and because of this, the MIB almost always uses the term "desmodian" when referring to a vampire.

2) Vampires and their fledglings are all required to register with the MIB and are strictly regulated to ensure public safety. Flesh-eating and feeding from humans are both forbidden by the MIB; vampires are only allowed to drink donated blood provided by MIB. Though most vampires, not wanting to harm others, are satisfied with these regulations, many other vampires (including the villain and his gang) choose instead to rebel against the MIB, feeding often for the fun of it or even simply to spite the MIB's regulations.

[JW%]

Only immediate thought that springs to mind is that Men In Black is intended to be quite humorous, with things that are odd or wacky being simply a part of the universe. In universe these things are considered normal and tolerated stoically, often with only a sideways glance by a newbie to point to the audience that there's a joke there. I don't immediately see the humor in this. It's just an alien virus that inspires cannibalism("Zombie" would seem to apply just as much as "Vampire" in my opinion). Your writing of course could supply that humor, but that's just my immediate thought after reading through that.

[Madame Celeste]

Thanks for your feedback JW!

You make a very good point about the humor element. My only real focus while I was designing the vampires as a race was how to keep the design as logically sound as possible, so I can definitely see how the fantasy/humor aspects were neglected. Did you have any suggestions for how to improve the current concept to that effect?

If it would help your brainstorming any, I could also give you my pre-draft concepts of the vampire characters, but I haven't been able to develop them completely yet so they might also be subject to change.

[JW%]

MIB doesn't always require extreme adherence to logic as we usually think of it. Unfortunately, I'm having some trouble coming up with something suitably humorous to do with this. The best I can think of is that the blood cravings can be staved off with(but no nutrition/regeneration gained from) some other kind of material. This leads to examples of a "Vampire" who likes to suck milk out of milk cartons, leaving fang marks in the cartons(it doesn't "feed" them, but it keeps them from going into a berserk state). Or something like that(I'm reminded of a Scifi novel I once read where the "Vampire" found chocolate to have roughly the right chemicals to keep her from the urge to kill people. At one point the villain deprived her of her chocolate chip cookies and didn't live to regret it as she tore open the airlock by hand to get at him and/or her cookies. Left the hero, a detective on a murder case, with a very odd report to write).

It might be good to include something about the process of mutation begins(reaches the point where the human antibodies can't resist it anymore) with an induced coma that places the fledgling vampire into a death like state while they mutate. Agents find a corpse that, in the middle of dissection, got up and ate the attending coroner who was doing the cutting, in order to regenerate back from being sliced up. I'm not sure.

Anyway, more information would be interesting at least. I'm no expert with the MIB universe though.

[Madame Celeste]

I've been thinking about your suggestions so far, and by far I think both would make great additions. For the first suggestion, I suppose sugar and sugary foods in general might be used as a cheap imitation of blood glucose, but I'm a little reluctant to use that because the Bugs from the first movie and from the cartoon series already did that. Another alternative could be salt, because salt retains water in the human body, and another factor (that I forgot to mention, sorry about that) is that the vampires will slowly dehydrate if they don't feed.

As for your second suggestion, I was actually debating between a seizure-ish first transformation or a brief coma/unconscious period, so I was certainly surprised to see that. In the latter case, however, I don't think it would work for the victim to be comatose through the entire transformation, because the central plot of the fic depends on the victim being conscious for at least a certain time frame before they are completely turned. (More specifically, the plot involves one of the canon characters being attacked and turned, after which said victim struggles with the transformation process while trying to get the saliva sample needed for the antidote.)

And finally, like I promised, here are the basic details I have so far on each of the vampire characters. Hope this helps!

SPOILER: Click to show

Story Details: Unlike most vampires, Lazarus wanted to become a vampire, even manipulating Malcolm into turning him despite Malcolm's initial refusals to do so. But Malcolm took Lazarus to MIB headquarters for medical treatment shortly after biting him, and there he explained to Lazarus the MIB's laws regarding vampires as I previously mentioned them. Lazarus was outraged not only at the laws themselves, but also at the fact that the other vampires at MIB HQ (Malcolm included) willingly obeyed the laws. Given a choice between registering as a desmodian or receiving an antidote and being neuralyzed, Lazarus refused both options and fled the building, becoming a fugitive. Since then, Lazarus took to searching for other unregistered vampires and recruiting them into his gang, and together they feed on anyone and everyone they choose.

OTHER NOTES

---> Lazarus' real name is Darryl Wagner, but he gave himself the name Lazarus shortly after being turned.

---> Lazarus' defining trait is his narcissism. Humans are nothing but a food source as far as he is concerned, and he thinks of himself as a revolutionary for defying the MIB's vampire laws. In fact, the central conflict of the story begins with him feeding on an MIB agent and broadcasting the attack to the entire HQ, out of a desire to "make a statement" to the MIB and to the registered vampires in particular.

---> A running gag in the story is that Lazarus claims to be a connoisseur of human blood, and can allegedly guess what a person's blood will taste like just by studying the person for a few seconds. He also claims to know how to add flavor to a person's blood, usually by manipulating the person's emotions in some way.

SPOILER: Click to show

Story Details: I haven't fleshed out much of Dina's background yet, but I did plan on her already knowing Lazarus while they were both still human. She frequently commands respect from the gang and from Lazarus himself; when Lazarus attacks and feeds on an MIB agent without telling her, Dina is resentful and openly confronts him about it. She makes Lazarus promise to give her the agent's partner to make up for it, but the partner ends up killing Dina in self-defense, and her death drives Lazarus and the gang to truly target the MIB and especially the partner for revenge, whereas their previous attacks were little more than a game to them.

OTHER NOTES

---> Though not as sadistic or self-absorbed as Lazarus, Dina does enjoy playing with victims before killing them, and often joins in Lazarus' games for this same reason. One tactic she likes to use on male victims is to tease them for some time prior to revealing herself as a vampire, lure them to a secluded area where Lazarus is already hiding, and sometimes briefly make out with them before Lazarus comes out of his hiding place, at which point they proceed to drain the victim together.

SPOILER: Click to show

Story Details: It will be revealed at some point that Malcolm is really Zed's older brother, who was turned accidentally after barely surviving a vampire attack when Zed was only a child. Apart from that, not much else has been fleshed out yet about Malcolm or his backstory.
A mortal Lazarus accidentally discovered that Malcolm was a vampire and eventually manipulated Malcolm into turning him, although I haven't yet decided on how to go about that. By the time of the fic, Malcolm still feels very guilty for turning Lazarus and thus helping him to become a murderer. Lazarus fully intended to feed on and ultimately kill the MIB agent he attacked, but the MIB finds the agent in time with Malcolm's help, and at Zed's request Malcolm turns the agent into a vampire to save his life.

[JW%]

True, sugar has already been used, and probably should be avoided for this. I was just using it as an example of works I have read that successfully use this kind of thing.

Salt might work... the thought of vampires constantly snacking on potato chips or pretzels or other salty snack foods, and then mentioning that they're always thirsty sounds kinda humorous.

The vampire wakes up in the morgue thing was used in one of the Blade movies I think. Anyway, one would think the coma induction only happens at a certain point. Perhaps a "point of no return"? One of the classic images of a vampire is that they rise from the grave, and you've not given any reason for these Desmodians to be in the grave in the first place. So that could be skipped entirely I suppose.

As for the characters, they seem to... I don't know... tie TOO closely into canon. It's something I get uncomfortable about, to tie something this large too closely into the canon, because it usually means it'll be contradicted by canon. Zed's brother, by itself, seems safe(we don't know about Zed's family, and I don't think canon is going to be eager to fill in that mystery). Couple that with a well known "alien race" who seems to be working rather closely with the MIB, that's never before seen, it starts tripping warning bells for me. I'm not saying this is necessarily a BAD thing, you could still write an exceptional piece, but it is a warning sign for me.

The connoisseur bit could be quite amusing as a running gag. I had a vampire character, I think in "World of Darkness" who would do something similar, it usually led to humorously awkward moments. He also worked under the assumption that emotions could flavor the blood, along with numerous other factors(he pretty specifically would politely decline feeding on someone who was too scared of him. He'd also make notes if the blood he was drinking was from a virgin or not, as well as guessing his 'victims' diets for the last couple of days and making comments about how they should watch their cholesterol.)