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Post by readerwritergirl on Aug 19, 2012 22:01:13 GMT -8
*Team Fortress 2 comes to mind*
Oh god, I don't wanna know...
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SP441
Member
Believe in Magic.[Mo0:5]
Posts: 278
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Post by SP441 on Sept 16, 2012 19:04:08 GMT -8
Now let's see... Final Fantasy VI... ...Oh dear god. Terra's character arc wouldn't be about finding herself and her place in the world, but about finding herself a man. Locke would protect every girl he found out of guilt for his girlfriend... because she broke up with him, and she was also frigid and mean, and he would never shut up about it. Edgar would have a loving wife and would not make passes at every woman he sees, he also would be a complete twit for a king. Sabin would lose his charisma and humor and become just a dumb hothead, he also wouldn't suplex trains because Meyer has aversion to awesome. Shadow would lose his tragic, subtle backstory and become generic brooding man, who gets together with his daughter at the end instead of letting himself die due to past guilt finally catching up/trying to keep a check on Kefka/Unable to live in a peaceful world (Seriously, I love Shadow). Cyan wouldn't lose his family, and be boring as fuck. Gau would get together back with his father happily, and wouldn't be socially inept, due to books or some shit. Celes wouldn't be a strong woman who keeps her emotions in check, yet cares for her friends, but a fragile little butterfly who gets in a love triangle with Locke and Terra. Setzer wouldn't be the carefree/mildly suicidal charismatic guy who grieves over his dead loved one, but some jackass with pseudo-personality who has a nice home with a white-bread american wife, and would have oodles of money for no reason. Strago would be just an extra, because old men are ugly. Relm and Sabin would get into a relationship... of sexual nature.
Kefka wouldn't be a crazy, megalomaniachal villain who kills destroys and causes wanton destruction because he finds that shit hilarious, but a sane, effeminate man who mildy incoveniences the party every once in a while.
The game would end at the floating continent, where the heroes talk Kefka out of destroying the world with friendship and love, and everyone would fart rainbows. ...Excuse me, I need alcohol...
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2012 9:50:30 GMT -8
If she ever directed Sonic The Hedgehog,then there would be a big impact on Shadows. He would probably turn in to a vampire.
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Lyra
Persistent Member
Professional Goatback Rider
Posts: 3,119
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Post by Lyra on Nov 12, 2012 22:40:59 GMT -8
Mother 3: *The entire family aspect would be ignored or just brushed over. *Lucas would be turned into a wangsty Marty Stu. He would stalk Kumatora constantly. *Kumatora would be turned into a spineless Mary Sue obsessed with Lucas and nothing else. She'd be useless in combat, and Lucas would get all her PSI. *Duster would be cut out due to being not attractive enough. *Porky would be replaced with a sexy man who is defeated by Lucas stalling him for a long time.
*The Magypsies would all be replaced with sexy men/women. Their views about human lives being novel due to their brevity would still be there, but glorified. *Boney is replaced with a shapeshifter who often takes a wolf form as a love interest rival for Lucas. He ends up loving Lucas and Kumatora's spawn created using PSI. Oh my gosh, what have I done!? Oh- and the entire setting is moved to a modern high school.
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Post by S-r-ex on Nov 13, 2012 3:45:01 GMT -8
Final Fantasy X - Tidus doesn't disappear at the end - And he'd just be brooding - Yuna would be a gaping fool who'd curl up without Tidus (imagine the wedding!) - Auron would be like Carlisle - Yevon would be a bunch of guys who just sits there and doesn't do anything before something happens - Chrissakes, you get the expies already! - No sacrifices needed to defeat Sin - Sin wouldn't be the guardian of a dream gone rogue due to the conjurer overloading his mind, just a big bad monster - THINGS CAN'T JUST BE DREAMS!!! - No summons, they are demons doing our bidding - The airship would fly through gravitational differential equivocality by electromagnetic repulsion of æther lines in atmospheric ions.
In other words, complete mess.
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Post by Chaotic Neutral on Nov 13, 2012 7:38:18 GMT -8
Shin Megami Tensei Let that thought sink in for a second. Now cry as all your favorite characters turn into cardboard characters. I hate you for putting that image in my head. Also, Devil Survivor.
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Post by Madame Celeste on Feb 28, 2013 1:58:44 GMT -8
If a certain Mrs. Meyer were to SOMEHOW convince Andrés Borghi to let her direct The Black Heart...? Hoo boy... ... I'm going to need a minute. The very idea of what she might do to this wonderful game makes me sick to my stomach... EDIT: Alright, here I go... 1) For starters, the basic setting would be tossed out the proverbial window. We can't have a "blood-stained world" that was once beautiful before being left in ruins due to war, now can we? Much too dark for poor SMeyer! About the only part she WOULD keep is the recent murder of the world's king. 2) Each and every one of the characters would be altered to the point of being unrecognizable: 2a) HASHI, a humanoid tree man who was exiled from his forest for his hatred and violence toward humans, would either be reduced to a side villain á la James, or the angsty misunderstood Jacob to Ananzi's Bella and Animus' Edward. (More on that in a minute.) The other two tree men mentioned in the game, Malen (their leader) and Bako, would serve little to no purpose in the story, and the side plot about their forest being slowly destroyed by corruption would be generally ignored. 2b) NOROKO, an onryō of a young girl whose spirit lies dormant in her old doll, would still want only to end her grudge so she can go to heaven, but said grudge would NOT be because she was brutally murdered by a cult leader, but rather because she never found her WUN TWU WUV while she was alive. *choke* 2c) PEKETO? As in, the demented ghost of a child sociopath who killed his abusive occult-obsessed father and several innocent people just because he likes to see the red of their blood, and who had made enough pacts with the dead that he's now effectively immortal? More than likely SMeyer would just discard him altogether, but assuming she doesn't, he'd most likely be made out to be a crazed "immortal child" not unlike SMeyer's description thereof in Twilight. 2d) ANIMUS, an immortal being who only wants to finally die after knowing nothing but torture for 400 years, would be bastardized in every possible sense of the word. His appearance would be changed from a scarred man with a perpetual fixed smile and only one all-yellow eye, to a brooding "Adonis-like" figure with two perfectly normal "liquid topaz eyes" and no scars or other blemishes to speak of. His past suffering and insatiable desire to die, which are both very genuine in the actual game, would be reduced to simple excuses for Animus to wangst on a regular basis. As stated before, he would be the Edward to Ananzi's Bella and Hashi's Jacob, and... may or may not turn out to be the son of Final, the last boss in the game. If he does, expect him to do even more wangsting because of it. 2e) ANANZI, the part-spider granddaughter of the murdered king, is the closest thing this game has to a main protagonist, and SMeyer would make damn sure that it shows. Ananzi is said to be very beautiful, but whether or not SMeyer would keep that is unclear; either way, expect Ananzi to be written as a whiny wallflower who hates all the attention that people give her, before she falls in TWU WUV with Animus and is then reduced to little more than a spineless damsel in distress who constantly has to be saved from danger by him and/or Hashi, who will fall for her only to be handwaved as a lesser alternative to the "godlike" Animus. This is especially insulting considering that Ananzi, along with her many sisters, is a member of her father's personal guard, and is much more badass in the real game than SMeyer would make her out to be. Oh, and also... Ananzi would NOT be killed by her own father in the end. Instead, she'll be attacked by Final and/or the Shar-Makai and be rescued by Animus in the nick of time. 2f) The SHAR-MAKAI, a race of monsters from the Chaos tamed by Prince Janos, would probably be kept more or less the same, but would be defanged considerably. (No injecting Shar-Makai embryos into victims if SMeyer has her way.) 2g) FINAL, a monster from the Chaos and the aptly-named final boss, would probably be left alone, except for one crucial detail... Final would NOT turn out in the end to be a protagonist who had no part in the king's murder, but who stole the king's heart (the titular Black Heart) to protect its power from the real villain. Instead, Final would be the main bad guy through and through. 2h) PRINCE JANOS... would NOT turn out to be the main bad guy and the actual murderer of his father, the king, and would NOT be the one who kills Ananzi, his own daughter. Instead, he'd just be a minor protagonist á la Carlisle Cullen, whose contribution (if any) to the plot would be overshadowed by the love triangle between Animus, Ananzi, and Hashi. 3) And finally, regarding the ending... Janos would NOT succeed in killing Final and taking the king's heart, thereby endangering both the other world and the human world with his conquest. Instead, Animus would save the day by killing Final, returning the heart to the kingdom, and beginning a cheesy, stalkerish high-school romance with Ananzi in the process.
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Post by firegirl26 on Mar 3, 2013 12:14:27 GMT -8
kingdom hearts story would love triangle between sora riku and kari. lame boss battles and the heartless is trying to kill Sora because kari is his true love.
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Post by KeyOfTheTwilight on Mar 4, 2013 3:48:41 GMT -8
Now let's see... Final Fantasy VI... ...Oh dear god. Terra's character arc wouldn't be about finding herself and her place in the world, but about finding herself a man. Locke would protect every girl he found out of guilt for his girlfriend... because she broke up with him, and she was also frigid and mean, and he would never shut up about it. Edgar would have a loving wife and would not make passes at every woman he sees, he also would be a complete twit for a king. Sabin would lose his charisma and humor and become just a dumb hothead, he also wouldn't suplex trains because Meyer has aversion to awesome. Shadow would lose his tragic, subtle backstory and become generic brooding man, who gets together with his daughter at the end instead of letting himself die due to past guilt finally catching up/trying to keep a check on Kefka/Unable to live in a peaceful world (Seriously, I love Shadow). Cyan wouldn't lose his family, and be boring as fuck. Gau would get together back with his father happily, and wouldn't be socially inept, due to books or some shit. Celes wouldn't be a strong woman who keeps her emotions in check, yet cares for her friends, but a fragile little butterfly who gets in a love triangle with Locke and Terra. Setzer wouldn't be the carefree/mildly suicidal charismatic guy who grieves over his dead loved one, but some jackass with pseudo-personality who has a nice home with a white-bread american wife, and would have oodles of money for no reason. Strago would be just an extra, because old men are ugly. Relm and Sabin would get into a relationship... of sexual nature. Kefka wouldn't be a crazy, megalomaniachal villain who kills destroys and causes wanton destruction because he finds that shit hilarious, but a sane, effeminate man who mildy incoveniences the party every once in a while. The game would end at the floating continent, where the heroes talk Kefka out of destroying the world with friendship and love, and everyone would fart rainbows. ...Excuse me, I need alcohol...
Since I've just started playing FF6 myself and am being obsessed with it right now. This made me want to just find something more terrible than this and burn my brain with that instead of this.
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Post by theclowhatter on Mar 4, 2013 15:01:22 GMT -8
If Meyer directed Castlevania: Symphony of the Night.
Hell, Alucard will never awaken to help humans. His mother would already become vamped and living eternally with Dracula. Since Alucard is a half breed, he will be a super speshul vampire.
Maria will fall in love with him not because Alucard is helping her to search for Richter, but because he's so pwetty. And her twu love. The Belmonts are seem as pitiful humans that envies the vampires. Because this clan can never be amazing as the vampires. They're just jealous.
Not because of their bloodline intertwine to fight the evil.
What a hack.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2013 6:41:30 GMT -8
I'm still trying to work out how she would direct Morrowind. I mean, I feel like it's sacrilege to just think about it. Here are my two cents though:
-Goodbye 36 Lessons of Vivec, I don't think she'd even try to change them, just scrap them completely -Speaking of Vivec, he wouldn't be Vivec, instead he'd probably just be portrayed as just some false prophet misleading the poor innocent dunmer along the false path or whatever, completely ignoring everything that made Vivec, well Vivec. -The Dunmer would most likely be seen as savages I suppose, or at least their lifestyles be seen as bad and to be pitied as they were mislead by their false prophets. -Any references to drugs and such would be removed, so Caius Cossades (or however you spell his name) wouldn't be a skooma addict, and none of the khajiit will mention their "sweet moon sugar" -Morag Tong would not even be mentioned at all. -The "good" daedra who used to comprise of dunmer worship would still be seen as being false gods. -The Nerevarine Prophecy would not be the result of Azura using her powers to resurrect Indoril Nerevar and get back at the Tribunal, instead it would be some other being that would have done so, and Azura is just taking the credit or something.
Oh so help me, I cannot continue. I'm sorry Morrowind.
EDIT
-NO LUSTY ARGONIAN MAID. -No Crassius Curio coming onto the Nerevarine.
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Post by Lady Phoenix on Mar 15, 2013 19:15:38 GMT -8
Final Fantasy IX
1. Garnet would be constantly pinning for Zidane and wouldn't give 2 shits for her royal duties. In fact, Alexandria would probably be in rubble by the end of the game (or built by deus-ex bullshit) 2. Zidane's care-free and adventurous personality would be dumped for his angst . . . only for it to turn into WANGST due to poor writing. Also, he would be an obsessive, selfish douchbag. 3. Steiner would be a villain because he's ugly 4. Freya would be seen as a bitch because of her blunt personality and the fact that she is a warrior. 5. Quina would not exist . . . period. 6. Kuja would be a love interest to Garnet ansd would do evil stuff to try and win her heart, and his villainous plots would not be as awesome. 7. Eiko would be paired up with Amarant 8. Vivi would not die and his major conflict would probably be tossed 9. Beatrix would pine after Zidane, would be extremely weak, be a bitch to Garnet, and would die a horrific death 10. Most of the the plot would be tossed for sappy romance
Anything else?
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Post by candypants on Mar 15, 2013 19:38:57 GMT -8
^You just hurt my everything. FF9 is my favorite Final Fantasy game and it hurt reading that.
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Post by BW-VTfan0 on May 17, 2014 20:34:46 GMT -8
Favorite game is Kingdom Hearts... I can't even think about it D:
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Post by arcanius on May 18, 2014 2:14:04 GMT -8
I don't exactly have a #1 game, so I'm going with one that I just like. Darksiders:
1. War will now have a love interest 2. All the christian symbolism is now specificaly mormon 3. No Council chosen by God to keep the balance. 4. War's tendency to be grimly silent is now replaced with whining 5. Humankind can no longer be restored from being dead 6. Abbadon doesn't die in the end. He's saved(From basicaly becoming Satan mk2...) and gets back with Uriel and everything is okay, instead of almost killing her, bringing about the end of the world, and then being ripped to pieces by a Rider of the Apocalypse. 7. The Hellguard angels are now sparkly and don't fight you 8. Vulgrim must be killed - he's not pretty. Doesn't matter if he's the only friendly demon around, and offers to trade stuff for souls. 9. After you kill him you get all his stuff, and immediately become OP 10. War's looks are now "hotter" by meyersverse standarts
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Post by orihime00sama on Oct 9, 2014 13:35:42 GMT -8
Umn... Final Fantasy VII:
- Cid and Barret's characters would be utterly destroyed; in fact, Barret wouldn't even exist because there can't be black characters in the main cast. Cid in the real FFVII: Sit your ass down on the chair and drink your goddamn tea! Cid in Smeyer's FFVII: *politely* Would you please sit on the chair and enjoy the tea?
- Don Corneo wouldn't exist, neither would Jenova and Shinra...
- Vincent, who already looks like a vampire, would've be turned into a real, sparkly and super angsty vampire. His funny lines like "Hit the brakes, Chief." wouldn't exist and he would constantly angst over Lucrecia.
- Yuffie would be a baby and Vincent's mate....
- Other stuff I REALLY don't want to imagine because the FFVII world would be turned into sparkly crap.
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