Ask BB's Ladies.

[blenderbender]

Blenderbender cheerfully lead her friend, Ahsoka into a storeroom in the Jedi Temple. "Ready, Ahsoka?" she asked excited. Ahsoka nodded, and sat down.

BB turned on a camera and piped up cheerily "Hello! I am BB, and this is Anakin Skywalker's Padawan Ahsoka. We're offering a Q&A with both of us. Ask away! Oh, and don't tell Anakin where we are. I'm not supposed to be alone with Ahsoka because Anakin is very overprotective.

[Brandon Skyblade]

A shadow appeared behind the pair, in hopes of making them turn around.
It then appeared again, this time faster.
It kept going back and forth, with creepy music that kept getting faster as it did. As it got very fast, a voice sounded the loud notes.

"DADADADAAAAAAAAA!" Brianna said, directly behind BB and Ahsoka.
"SIS! Get the hell out of there and back to our side!" Brandon said, his webcam screen popping up in front of them.
"Alright, alright...the moment they revealed it, it was a teleportation target." Brianna said, touching the screen and disappearing from view. She reappeared on Brandon's side, directly behind him.
"Please excuse my sister. She can be a bit...hyper-active at times. Anyway, I'm Brandon and she's Brianna. Our friend Twili is out at the moment, but she should be back soon." Brandon explained.

Suddenly, Kyle Katarn quickly walked behind the two, noticing the camera. "The hell are you guys looking at-oh crap, the kid I freaked out. I'm outta here." He said, walking out.
The twins simply stared at Kyle, opening up a separate webcam to me, obviously wanting an explanation.
"Too long a story to explain. Just get to asking." I said before cutting myself off.
"Okay...well, we have material. Do you somehow know him, Ahsoka?" Brianna asked, totally curious.

[blenderbender]

Blenderbender immediatly jumped in front of Ahsoka, pointing at Brianna "Look Ahsoka! A person coming out of cameras! Isn't that neat!" she babbled excitedly. Ahsoka blinked. "Hello. I think there was a famous Jedi Master named Brianna. I'm Ahsoka. BB is the human." she greeted, just deciding to sweep the oddness under the rug. Things had been very weird ever since that guy Kyle came to the Temple. His freakout had been placed onto one recording and, despite the Master's efforts to make him seem like a misguided man with issues, it still became a huge source of comedy among Padawans and young Knights.

Then Kyle walked up, and subsequently ran off. "Yeah, I know him. I was all upset because my Master wasn't at the Temple, and then he ran over and started asking about Anakin. I told him I was his Padawan, he screamed like a girl, and started asking things. He then ran off." she explained.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa...famous Je-Jedi Ma-Master named...Brianna!?" Brianna asked, utterly in shock.
Where in the hell was THAT in the canon!? Brandon thought. "Anyway...oh, that's what he did? How did he get there anyway, isn't he-" He said before being cutoff by a private message from me. "Oh...never mind, then. So, anything you wanna ask, Bri...anna."

Brianna was too busy staring into space with absolute stars in her eyes about the concept of a Jedi Master being named Brianna. "Must...meet!!"
"Brianna? Sis? Hellooooooo?" Brandon said, snapping his fingers in front of her to no avail. "Ye gods, she's hopeless now...hey wait, a topic Pichu ISN'T in and I use that."

Twili then walked in and saw Brandon's failed attempt at getting Brianna snapped out of her trance. "Do I even wanna...hey, is that Ahsoka?" She said, walking over to the computer. "Well, I'll be, it is. What are you doing contacting us?"
"Need I remind you of the Ask section? And...you don't wanna ask." Brandon replied.
"Jedi Master...Brianna...oh man, that has such a great ring to it..." Brianna uttered to herself.
"Yeah...not gonna ask, Brandon." Twili commented.
"Good...please, don't." Brandon said back.

[blenderbender]

Ahsoka nodded "Yeah! She was trained by the Jedi Exile, and helped rebuild the Order. Technically, she never made the rank Knight, but they called her a Master for helping rebuild. She was a historian." she explained to the starry eyed girl. BB added "That was thousands of years ago though, she's dead now. Since you seem interested, she's in Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords. but she's only available if you're a light sided male." Ahsoka did a double take "How so?! The Exile was a girl!" she asked incredulously. BB shrugged "Pushed programmers for a Christmas release, and so a lot of plot was lost."

Ahsoka beamed "Hello!" then she wrinkled her face in thought "Have we met?" she asked, confused.

All of a sudden, Serra Keto and Leah Clearwater ran into the room, and began to barricade the door. "Should I ask?" BB asked, nervous. She's invited these two to the Q&A, but if they were going to start something, then BB might want to run. "You know the Baby Ludi chick, that people want us to return to her mother, despite the dangers a Force Sensitive toddler in the house?" Serra asked in a rush, looking for more crates to barricade the door with. "Yeah..." Ahsoka and BB both said, wondering if they should be worried. The People's Inquisition, Anti-Jedi activists, civillians (mainly university students), and the media had had a fit the last time Ludi was there. Recently, Ludi was being trained on Kampras, and so the hullabuloo moved with her. "Well, the Council finally admitted a Force sensitive toddler's tantrums can send things flying and if they gave her to the mom, she'd likely get hurt or worse and they don't wanna deal with her death/injury, because they'd still have to take the baby. They figured they'd skip the dead mom part, but they still got flack for it. The people who threw a hissy last time are having a freaking circus. We're hiding out until they leave."Serra explained.

"Ooookaayyyy. Looks like Leah and Serra are sticking around."BB said, turning to the camera. "Damn right! I am not going out there to be pushed, and shoved, and interviewed by reporters who think I'm a Jedi!" Leah exclaimed.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"There really was a..." Brandon and I said at once...sounding as if one voice was merely echoed due to us being pretty much the same, appearance-wise.
"THERE REALLY WAS ONE!" Brianna exclaimed, running right out of the house upon doing so.
"Brandon, where is she going?" Twili asked, getting a bit worried.
"Probably rushing right out to get KotOR 2." Brandon answered.
"Okay, I'm SO getting that after Christmas...hopefully, ordinary GameStops still carry them..." I said, looking it up on said company's site. "Twenty bucks pre-owned!" I said after 20 seconds of looking.

Brianna burst into the room again, carrying the game in her hand. "YESZ!" She exclaimed like Captain Falcon. "Ohhhhh man, the one time I won't mind playing as a guy again."
"Okay...anyway..." Brandon said, trying to change the subject.
"Oh, sorry about that, Ahsoka. I'm their friend, Twili. And...well, no, we haven't met, actually. I've just read a lot about Jedi history." Twili said.
"Not to mention a certain recent TV show that details your escapades with Anakin, Ahsoka." Brandon added.

Meanwhile, Brianna put the new box inside and headed back to her friends. "Oh, Serra's there, too. And...someone I totally forgot about. Ah well, Serra was an easy opponent in Episo-"
Brandon quickly covered her mouth, unwilling to reveal Serra's fate. "Easy opponent in a Jedi-related fighting game, of course!" Brandon made up, reminding himself of the only actual Star Wars-based fighter around...which was a while ago...about only the original trilogy...and sucked. "Man, I'm not bringing that game up again..."
Brianna glared at him, demanding to be released. Brandon did so, hoping she learned her lesson.
"I'm sure it was just the AI's fault in her lack of difficulty..." Twili said, not wanting it to sound like the non-existent game made Serra's skills sound lacking.

In the meantime, I wondered who this Leah was. "Hey, BB, who exactly is Leah again?" I asked.

[blenderbender]

"Damn, she's really excited about Brianna." Ahsoka smiled. BB grinned "She was a white haired hybrid who became a Jedi with a passion for hitting things. How can one not love her?" Ahsoka looked at the game with disdain "I still don't get how they can have the Dark Side, or the Exile as a guy for playing options." she muttered. Then, Blender got annoyed "Oh come on! I've been looking for that game forever and I can never find it!" she grumbled.

Ahsoka smiled, understanding "Okay! I get it now. Yeah, BB shows me Wookiepedia and TV Tropes sometimes. It's awkward not really exsisting." she exclaimed. BB looked up "Ordinarily I'd tell you not to complain, because you're in a kids tv show, but the writers of your tv show are bloodthirsty. I'd start on my will if I were you." she teased. Leah nodded "I'd especially start, since when you fall to the dark side in this season, I think Anakin will literally kill you." she agreed. Ahsoka gaped at Leah. "THE DARK SIDE! Buh-but. I-I-I can't!" she shrieked. Leah turned to Blenderbender, who was glaring at her "I'm guessing the glare means you didn't show her the ad on Starwars.com?"Leah inquired. "I wasn't planning on it, until we know she falls, or if Anakin was having a nightmare, or if she's brainwashed or something." BB admitted. "Oh. Well shit." Leah replied.

Serra twitched. BB told her about the game. Not like she had much choice, when she walked in on her playing it. As much as Serra tried, BB didn't say her fate, only that the game made her an easy defeat for Anakin. "Don't remind me. I'm still trying to figure out why Anakin and I were dueling in the first place. Stupid hot-headed little surrogate brother. At least, according to BB, we fight evenly in the cutscenes. Stupid game producers giving me crappy skills." she grumbled.

Leah spoke up before BB "I'm Leah Clearwater. Yeah from Twifail. Don't hate the character, hate SMeyer." she explained. "Man! I wish Meyer was a better author. I get sick of introducing myself that way." she grumbled to her self.

[Brandon Skyblade]

Suddenly, a record scratch played.

"You're a character from...oh ye gods, you poor soul!" Twili cried.
"Yeah...you know it's sad when tons of people on the Net can do a better job than a published author..." Brandon muttered.

Meanwhile, Brianna's star-struck moment was even further enhanced by the quick explanation. "SHE LOVES HITTING THINGS!? Ye merciful gods, did you pick a winner when naming me, bro!"
"Hey, our mother would've given me...or us...or, whatever...that name if I was a girl, so I immediately jumped to that for you, remember?" Brandon explained.
"Exactly. Our mother is a GENIUS! My personality (though coincidental from the name) combined with the Brianna as a Jedi!? You know what? SCREW the game being unfinished to an extent, I'm getting her as a party member!!!" Brianna exclaimed.
"A pa-pa-pa...party member?" I asked.
"Yep, did you check the Star Wars wiki? Hell, she's a love interest for a male MC! How about that!" Brianna explained, with my own face summing up my thoughts:

"WHY DO I NOT HAVE THIS GAME!?" I shouted.

[blenderbender]

Leah smiled "Yeah, well, at least I'm loved on the Internet." she paused and added upon reflection "Well, by Anti's anyway." Ahsoka smiled at Leah "I still like you." she assured the she-wolf. "Yeah, well, after you backed me up when Meyer stole the Death Star, I kinda like you too kid. Even if you do turn to the Dark Side." Leah replied smiling. Ahsoka immediatly got sad, thinking about falling to the Dark Side.

BB piped up "She also gets to kick the hell out of her sisters. And she survived multiple rounds of Force Lightning!"

Suddenly somebody started knocking at the door and using the Force to try to get it open. Leah screamed "SERRA! THE PERIMETER IS BEING BREACHED! CODE RED! NOT A DRILL!" Then she ran over to the door, pushing the crates back to the door, trying to keep it from opening. Serra used the Force to keep the door shut. "SERRA! I CAN SENSE YOUR IN THERE, AND I CAN SENSE AHSOKA'S UPSET! LET ME IN!" Anakin shouted from the outside. Serra shouted back "IT'S THAT WEIRDO KYLE'S FAULT SHE'S SAD! GO BOTHER HIM, AND LEAVE OUR SANCTUARY ALONE!" The pounding stopped, they heard a lightsaber ignite, and Anakin walking through the screaming Anti-Jedi crowds that were still throughout the Temple.

Serra looked at the camera "Tell Kyle I said sorry about that. He can yell at me over my blog if he wants."

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Oh yeah...heh heh...the 'blog'...sorry if I never bothered to update that part." I said with a clearly faking-it grin.
"Not my fault that I didn't know about a time pa-" Kyle said from another room before being pelted by a random boot.
"To him, I bequeath...a boot to the head." Brianna stated.

"Uh...'stole the Death Star?'" Twili asked about. "Despite my actual nickname, it's more of a Zelda reference than anything else, so I wouldn't know too many details about that plot. And I don't plan on finding out unless there's a perfectly normal way to explain it..."
"By that, you mean someone trying to make sense of that nonsensical story that would making whipping vampires to kill them more realistic than it sounds?" Brandon asked, of course referring to Castlevania. "...Not that those games are bad, but I'm just saying."
"It's a HOLY whip, technically. Conveniently, so are a bunch of knives and axes and stopwatches, but hey, the cross and water make sense." Brianna added.
"Water that BECOMES BLUE FIRE! ...And is the most broken weapon in Symphony of the Night. More so than Alucard's starting over-powered sword." Brandon added, fueling the Castlevania tangent even more.

"...While they probably eventually argue over 'what is a man', anything else you wanna ask them, Twili?" I asked.
"Yep, just one thing. Can you just let Anakin in? This would be a lot more interesting with Skywalker around." Twili replied.
"Just...keep the Hayden Christensen acting out of it. Watching 2 and 3 again...I realize he really could've done a lot better. This new series seems to make him a more legit character, to me." I added.

[blenderbender]

BB smiled "Ehh, no harm, no foul. If you ever get a chance to update, feel free." she told him. Ahsoka giggled at Brianna throwing boots at Kyle. "You're funny." she said to her.

"You don't wanna know. Trust me." Leah replied. "I still have nightmares about it."

BB sighed. "I wish we could let him in, but somebody claimed Darth Vader, and I don't know if they'd appreciate me using Anakin."

Serra, either not hearing BB, or not caring, said "No! We can't risk those psycho media people getting in here."

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Thanks, Ahsoka." Brianna said, smiling at her. The shouting in the background, on the other hand, started to get on her nerves. "Okay, that's it...JACK IN!" She shouted, transporting herself back to BB's side. "Excuse me, one sec." She said, pushing Serra aside and removing enough equipment to squeeze through the door without leaving it too vulnerable.
"Ye merciful gods, what now?" Brandon asked, wide-eyed at his sister's action.
Brianna took a deep breath and...

"Will you media-grubbing, private-life-penetrating, purely-heartless bastards of news people kindly SHUT THE FUCK UP and move on!? You know what? I bet Palpatine has a lovely new piece of war legislature that you're all bound to enjoy! Go bother his dumb ass and leave that poor girl alone before I have to whip out a sword and SMACK AND/OR CHOKE A BITCH!!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, retreating back into the room and fully barricading it up again. "You're welcome." She said to Serra as she went back to Twili's house.

"Oh...damn." Brandon said, amazed at the lung capacity and sheer volume of Brianna's voice.
"She's giving ME a run for my money." Twili noted.

[blenderbender]

Ahsoka smiled back at Brianna, and stepped aside as she came through the screen. Outside the door, after Brianna's outburst, the reporters went silent. Then, everything got about ten times worse. Hearing the commotion, Serra and Leah ran to recreate the barricade. "Thanks for trying kid, but these reporters are animals! Then there's the civillians, Anti-Jedi activists, and the supposedly- neutral- Jedi- accountability- group People's Inquistion who are just here because they can't handle the court's decision to leave Aris-Del Wari with us, and the Council saying they don't want the stupid kid's mom to die! So, basically, they're here to torture us." she explained.

Suddenly, there was loud knocking outside the door. "Yo! Ahsoka! Let me in!" shouted some man. "Who is that?" Leah asked. Ahsoka brightened "Kidd? How did you know I was in here?" she asked. "Galactic Positioning System! Your comm link has it! Now let me in, before I'm trampled!" Kidd pleaded. Ahsoka hurried over, undid part of the barricade, and let him in. In slid a muscular blue Twi'lek. "Hey, babe. Is Anakin here, or can we-?" "I'd advise you not to finish that sentance, since as Anakin's "older sister" I'm obligated to tell him about anything that happens with you two." Serra cut him off. "So, Kidd, you gonna stick around?" BB asked. "Hell yes. I'm not going out there with those psycho media people." Kidd replied.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"I'm gonna have to slash someone, aren't I?" Brianna asked, being pulled back by Brandon. "Come on, I can retreat back here when I'm done!"
"Don't hurt any of them." Brandon ordered.
"But...otherwise?" Brianna asked.
"Cut loose non-lethally." Brandon suggested, brightening Brianna up.
"Alright...hold on, Mega Man!" Brianna said as she went off into Twili's room and jumped into the TV.
A moment later, she came back out with a giant arm in her left hand and a small orb in her right. She jumped back to BB's side, squeezing past the barricade. "Now you all dun goofed! Take this!" She said, jumping straight up. "FLASH BOMB!" She quickly said, tossing down the orb and blinding everyone in the room since it could function as a flash grenade. Her other arm, while piloting the Guts Arm, lifted almost everyone up at once and tossed them out of the temple. Once the weapon vanished, she placed a bunch of durable energy shields in front of the room and went right back. She went back to Twili's house shortly after.
"...You know, you're quite the Mary Sue outside of a serious RP." Brandon noted.
"Comes with the hyperspace territory." Brianna pointed out.

"Umm...anything you wanna ask us, now?" Twili asked.

[blenderbender]

"Umm, can I start with, who are you people?!" Kidd asked.

Serra grinned with sadistic glee at the sounds of reporters being beaten. "I think I can die happy now." she said.

Outside they heard the people much more politely asking information from Jedi.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"And people say violence never solves anything...I'm disappointed in whoever does." Brianna said, grinning at her success.
"Can...we just get back to a civil Q&A now?" Brandon asked.
"Sure thing...but, no Ani? Aww man." Brianna replied, disappointed.
"We'll get Skywalker in there eventually, for now, let's get this train rolling again." Brandon said back.

"They're Brandon, Twili and Brianna. Saving myself a few lines of an intro and just getting on with it." I said to Kidd.
"...Uh, anything else besides flipping out at Brianna's insanely hyper attitude?" Twili asked.

[blenderbender]

"Whoever said that is extremely sheltered." Serra replied.

Kidd shuddered "Anakin's coming. Well, on one hand, he's kinda my idol for podracing, and on the other, he does not like me having a thing for Ahsoka." BB smirked "Wait until he finds out you tried to kiss her." Kidd shuddered.

Serra smiled at Brianna "I'm sort of like Anakin's surrogate older sister, and I can give you some very embarrassing details about him if you want 'em." she offered, grinning evilly.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Do. Freaking. Tell." Brianna said, gaining a grin of her own.
"Oh boy, this'll be-" Brandon got out.
"-Will you stop worrying about every damn action I take? Good lord, and I thought Twili was supposed to be like that!" Brianna interrupted.
"We both need to be that way with you. With the things you've done around here, it's amazing you haven't gotten yourself killed at least once." Twili interjected.
"Well, I'm reckless! So what?" Brianna retorted.
"There's your problem. You're reckless. As in 'way more than Anakin could ever HOPE to be' reckless.'" Brandon said back at her.
"...Whatever. Anyway, let's hear some juicy tidbits about Ani, then let him have his way with the poor sucker that just entered the room." Brianna said to Serra, referring to Kidd with the last statement.

[blenderbender]

"I'm too young to die! Especially by lightsaber!" Kidd whined. Serra shrugged "Should've thought of that before you made out with his "little girl"." Serra replied. "We didn't make out! He saw us about to kiss, and cut us off like the moment killer he is. Oh! And he got pissy when he found out I kissed her cheek for luck, and kissed her hand to say goodbye." Kidd protested. Serra told him "I meant, he found out about you coming to Coruscant, climbing up to her window, and you two, *ahem* spending the night together." "...Okay fine, we made out that time, but it was just kssing and talking! What's his issue?" he asked. BB sighed "He's a paternal figure. He's wired to hate you." she explained. Kidd pouted, and began writing his will, still displeased with the upcoming demise.

Serra smirked "What part of his life do you wanna her about? I've got so much to say about him."

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Anything and everything. Nothing but the best bits!" Brianna demanded.
"Wait, how much could you possibly need to know that we haven't already played, read or watched?" Brandon asked.
"Something that could be BS'd in the blink of an eye, that's what." Brianna replied. "Now, have at you with the secrets!"

[blenderbender]

Serra grinned "Well, there was one time after he turned eighteen. That's the legal drinking age on Coruscant, so I took him to a bar, telling Obi-Wan that we were going to get something to eat." Ahsoka sat down on a crate, extremely interested in hearing what she had to say. She loved hearing about her Master when he was younger, but he didn't like to talk about it. Leah and BB were also interested. Kidd was still writing his will.

"So, I took him to this really trashy bar with his friends Tru, Darra, and this other loser Ferus. Tru and Ferus could drink, but Darra was only seventeen. Guess who we made designated pilot? We went in, and we all had a bunch of drinks, bar Darra. Poor little Darra. She died that year too. Still, I'm off topic. Anakin had never had alcohol before and he was hammered in record time! So was Tru, but Tru wasn't funny to watch. Ferus, the little brown noser, drank one, maybe two bottles before he said he was full. Such a liar. I had quite a bit, but it was the weak stuff. I was the one that needed to explain to their masters why three out of four kids were past the flying limit of alcohol, so I needed rationing power. Anakin was so drunk, he could barely walk straight. He was stumbling around all over the place, looking sick, and saying the stupidest things ever. If you guys have never seen Anakin Skywalker roaring drunk, you need to see it. It was a riot! Of course now, he's good at handling his alcohol, but still. It doesn't get any funnier then when Anakin, who hated Ferus beyond all reason, thought he was a hot girl! Poor Ferus! I think Ferus went into the boys room to hide out for the rest of the night. Then Anakin went outside, threw up, came back inside, and put the moves on his friend Darra. No, Darra didn't know what happened, and she did not know when the two went out the speeder to check the gas. For an hour. Yeah, Anakin sure got lucky that night." Serra paused, trying to recall the rest, since she'd been pretty drunk herself.

"They came back, and Anakin had another drink. He was stumbling around, barely keeping himself from throwing up, and so Ferus and Darra tried to get him to stop. Being the loving sister I am, I shouted "Anakin Skywalker you finish that lum! You know we Jedi don't waste!", and then he actually drank it! I swore he was gonna throw up, and apparently, he did when he got home. Several times. When we went back to the Temple, Darra went to take Tru home, Ferus was sober enough to walk home, and Anakin and I got busted big time when I took Anakin to the apartment he and Obi-Wan shared. I've never seen Obi-Wan turn that shade of purple before. He was so mad, but since the bar did serve food, and Anakin was of age, he couldn't say anything! Anakin had a terrible hangover though, and I've mocked him mercilessly though, so I guess it evens out." she finished.

Leah looked at Brandon "Is that in the movie, books, games, etc.?" she asked.

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Like hell it is. First-hand accounts like that are generally...too detailed for those things to have room for. Basically, if we never heard about it, people make stuff up." Brandon explained.
"But, when we tend to hear those details from the characters themselves...it becomes true. At least the way we see it." Brianna added. Brandon nodded in response. "Man, now I wanna go to a bar with him. Legal age was 18 for you lucky bastards? Gah...stupid US government...seriously, we haven't had any-"
Brandon covered her mouth to prevent another off-topic tangent. "Not now, alright?" He said, turning to the camera again. "So, how about-"
"-We let Ani in here now! Of course, we're gonna need some protection for Kidd here, but that's beside the point!" Brianna intercepted, smiling.

[blenderbender]

"Yeah, on Coruscant anyway. It all depends what planet you go too. I think it's 14 on Naboo. I know it's 21 on Alderaan. So it definitly varies. " Serra explained.

BB looked up "I'm not sure I can let Anakin in. Someone already claimed Anakin, and I'm not sure they'll take kindly to me using Anakin."

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Aww man, who took it? I'll have to...'negotiate' with them." Brianna said, getting a sharp glare from her brother.
"You'll do nothing of the sort." Brandon quickly replied.
"Good! Least I won't have to wonder what the hell is going on around here!" Kyle said from a distant room.
"Stow it, Katarn! Anyway...any more stories to tell, Serra? I bet you and Ahsoka have LOADS more than a simple bar story." Brianna said, smirking again.

[blenderbender]

Serra smiled "Well, there was that one time I locked him in a closet with Ferus Olin and wouldn't let them out until they either kissed or killed each other. Except then Obi-Wan and Siri made me let them out early. Good thing too, since Anakin had Ferus in a choke hold and the kid was turning blue. Oooh! Or I could tell you about the time when our Masters decided we needed to know about sex. That was funny as hell, but it's not quite embarrassing. I could tell it if you want, or I could think of something else."

[Brandon Skyblade]

"Considering the Masters are quite bad at the whole keeping each other from loving others, that whole talk has to be QUITE the sight. Let's hear it!" Brianna said. If only Anakin knew about that leniency...we'd actually have a GOOD time paradox on our hands!

[blenderbender]

"Well, it started off like any other day. Anakin, Tru, Ferus, and Darra were hanging out with me in the apartment my Master and I shared. Darra wanted to see how the makeup I got for my birthday looked, and so I had Anakin tie the little jerk to a chair, and put it on him. Just as I finished up, our Masters came in. First thing out of Siri's mouth? 'Ferus, why are you tied up and wearing makeup?'. The little rat squealed on me, but the look of pure relief and the way she said "Oh, thank the Force! Err- I mean, Serra, that's not nice. Ferus, that's not your shade." was purely epic. Of course, Obi-Wan, being the killer of funny moments, asked us to sit down so they could talk to us. I had no idea why they wanted to talk to all of us at the same time, but later I found out it was because Obi-Wan and my old Master were scared of the kind of questions their filthy minded Padawans would have." Serra paused, remembering the looks of pure torment on Obi-Wan's face and trying not to burst out laughing at the memory.

"Anakin, the master of subtlety that he is, asked what they wanted to talk about. Poor Master Kenobi looked ready to die when he said sex. It was like he'd honestly never said the word before. The first thing that popped into my head was that I was 18, several Masters had given my age group "the talk", and I knew a few Holonet slang terms for certain things I can't repeat in front of Ahsoka without Anakin coming after me. Apparently, on Tatooine, slaves learn about sex pretty fast because the first thing that came into my head also came out of Anakin's mouth. Obi-Wan damn near had a heart attack hearing his 12 year old Padawan blurt out "I already know about sex!", followed by me saying the same thing. Obi-Wan asked him how he knew anything about sex, pointedly glaring at me, by the way. Always a scapegoat, never the escapee. Anakin told him he learned about it while he was a slave. My master, smart man that he is, asked us what we knew about sex. Poor Anakin was beet red, so being the lovable sister I am, immediately started saying everything I knew in the most vulgar and grotesque terms and I gave all the masters a few heart attacks. Then, when I was done, Anakin did the exact same thing, and let me tell you, that kid knew disturbing things from sex slaves he met. The masters actually needed to leave to rethink their strategy. As soon as they left, I made smoothies for me and Anakin, and gave him our plot. Thanks to us two, the others had plenty of questions for the Masters, so they gave a huge standarized version of "the talk", and me and Anakin went to town on them. We gave every single obscene, filthy gesture we could think of, making dirty comments, slurping and blowing bubbles in our smoothies at appropriate times, and making tons of faces and moans at times. Our masters wound up throwing us out of the room so they could have "the talk" in a relatively PG way."

[Brandon Skyblade]

Each of the trio was cracking up throughout the story, with Brianna in full-blown laughter by the end.

"DAMN. Just...DAMN. I just wish Anakin could've learned all that in a different way. But still...man, that was NOT for the easily disturbed, was it?" Brandon commented.
"I don't think I can picture Obi-Wan ever being THAT scared out of his mind!" Twili added. Even counting their fated fight, I think he was more scared HERE than at that point!
"That poor bastard never saw it coming! Ani caught him off-guard and threw him for a loop while Serra makes him go around the loop at light-speed! I bet it took him WEEKS to recover from that amazement! He must have been about ready to be a Je-die! HA! HA! HA!" Brianna said, still laughing hysterically. "Keep 'em coming! This is just too good!"

[blenderbender]

BB, Leah and Ahsoka were laughing at the story, trying to imagine the cool collected Obi-Wan freaking out. Serra smiled "Their were three major highlights, one right after the other. As soon as the Masters came in after Anakin and I told them what we knew, Darra looks at them and says "Masters, I have a question.", then when Obi-Wan starts off by saying sex is between a man and a woman, Anakin pointed out that two men and two women can have it, and Obi-Wan says for the purpose of the discussion, it's only between straight people, and so Anakin asked if they had something against gay people. Poor Obi-Wan had to think hard to get out of that. Then, Siri said that you should be married when you first have sex, Anakin asked if that meant none of them had ever had sex. The looks on their faces plainly told us they were lying if they said they hadn't. I told them that, and they threw the both of us out." she recalled.

After Brianna asked for more stories, Serra made a face. "Well, there was the time the Council got the brilliant idea that Anakin and I would be more responsible if we looked after the younglings while their caretakers were in a meeting. That went over well." she said sarcastically.

[Brandon Skyblade]

Each of the trio started to laugh even harder than before (me, in real life included), with Brianna practically laughing like a hyena at this point.
"Holy cow, I WANNA party with Anakin now! Why the hell aren't you letting him in this!? I know he's gonna have stories as well!" Brianna asked.
"Sis...she can't, remember? He's been...taken as a puppet...by someone else." Brandon said, laughing when he paused.
"Fine then...KYLE, get your ass in here!" Brianna shouted.

"For Mothma's sake, the hell do you want now?" Kyle asked, clearly annoyed.
"Do you have any hilarious stories to tell about your escapades? Maybe about Luke or something?" Brianna asked.
"You're kidding, I got a million of those. Any specifications needed?" Kyle asked back.
"Just ANYTHING!" Brianna replied.
"Alright then, let me pick." Kyle said, thinking about a good story.

"Aha, here's one from a bit of old Jedi trivia Luke had uncovered. A little while ago, Luke brang back some old, heavily damaged encryptions from the old-er...the archives. This was before I personally saw the place swarming with Jedi, by the way. Anyway, he let me take a look at them while a mechanic team got to work attempting to repair them. Hilariously enough, one of the first entries that was repaired involved the whole 'Jedi not being able to love' rule. From what I'm hearing now, that rule was more of a suggestion than anything else. Sure, I GUESS it had made sense, but it seemed way too over-protective of a rule. Hell, look at Jan. Couldn't be a better Jedi without her paling around. We fooled around and talked about the old rule for a little while, and when he gets a call on his portable intercom, I comment that "It's amazing that you debate the damn thing when you can't even get a girl yourself." His face darkened like I hadn't seen before and he told me that he was speaking with Mara Jade. HIS GIRLFRIEND. And SHE HEARD THAT. And she was only letting him know that he was INSIDE THE TEMPLE. WHERE WE WERE. My word, starting about 5 minutes later, I could NOT feel part of my face for a good couple of hours from the humongous slap she gave me. "And I thought Skywalker was a textbook Master..." I said to myself that night. Man...that girl's got so much of an arm, I STILL feel it whenever I remember it."

The three cracked up more once Kyle mentioned Mara Jade.
"Don't go showboating that you have a girlfriend and you don't know that your other friend has one, then, buddy." Brianna commented.