Dear Sparklepire
Oct 31, 2014 6:18:44 GMT -8
Post by valkyria on Oct 31, 2014 6:18:44 GMT -8
Summary : Bella Swan just found out about Edward's sparkliness in the Sunlight. She got shocked and wrote him a letter the next day. It's meant to be a parody love letter between Edward and Bella.
Disclaimer : I don't own Sparklepire or Bella-Sue or Twilight by author Stephenie Meyer!
To : My Dearest Sparklepire
Thank you for being oh-so-impressive about your sparkles. I've just seen the most romantic thing ever in my life : you, as my boyfriend, sparkle in the Sunlight. From now on, we can make sparkly love and I hope my children with you would be glittery as well. Actually, on second thoughts, I don't because it's not natural and humans could spot them easily.
So for that, I want to break it off with you. You've shocked me to death with your sparkliness. And although you don't suck my blood, you still want to drink it, so it's a perpetual menace for me, as your girlfriend. I'm sorry I can't go down this path with you anymore, after you've shown me how sparkly you can be. And I am sorry, because I really don't know how I should take it. Should I take it as a supernatural power or something extraordinary or something really abnormal? Because it's not normal, even for vegetarian vampires, to sparkle in the Sunlight. Hence why I really want to break it off with you.
I mean, right now, I don't even know what you are anymore, you say you are a "Vampire", but you glitter in the Sunlight, which doesn't make it right. So am I with a "Sparklepire" or a normal "Vampire"? I don't know anymore, but I hope you won't get offended by me calling you that because you sparkle in the Sun rather than die like normal vampires should. And I really am tired of all the things you've kept secret from me, it's time I said my piece on things too. So here's what I'm feeling right now : completely conflicted and I don't know what you, as my boyfriend, are. And which is why we aren't in a good relationship at all, and which is why I wish to end it so badly, I'm sorry to break your already dead heart because of it, but I must be out of it as soon as possible before I go insane. Please understand my reasons for leaving you: you are keeping big secrets from me such like your sparkliness, and it's unsettling for me and I can't go on any longer with you. I'm so very sorry.
Not so yours any longer,
Bella Swan, your ex-girlfriend.
And she sent her letter to Edward, signed it with her own personalized handwriting.
My anti fanfic piece, hope you like.
Disclaimer : I don't own Sparklepire or Bella-Sue or Twilight by author Stephenie Meyer!
To : My Dearest Sparklepire
Thank you for being oh-so-impressive about your sparkles. I've just seen the most romantic thing ever in my life : you, as my boyfriend, sparkle in the Sunlight. From now on, we can make sparkly love and I hope my children with you would be glittery as well. Actually, on second thoughts, I don't because it's not natural and humans could spot them easily.
So for that, I want to break it off with you. You've shocked me to death with your sparkliness. And although you don't suck my blood, you still want to drink it, so it's a perpetual menace for me, as your girlfriend. I'm sorry I can't go down this path with you anymore, after you've shown me how sparkly you can be. And I am sorry, because I really don't know how I should take it. Should I take it as a supernatural power or something extraordinary or something really abnormal? Because it's not normal, even for vegetarian vampires, to sparkle in the Sunlight. Hence why I really want to break it off with you.
I mean, right now, I don't even know what you are anymore, you say you are a "Vampire", but you glitter in the Sunlight, which doesn't make it right. So am I with a "Sparklepire" or a normal "Vampire"? I don't know anymore, but I hope you won't get offended by me calling you that because you sparkle in the Sun rather than die like normal vampires should. And I really am tired of all the things you've kept secret from me, it's time I said my piece on things too. So here's what I'm feeling right now : completely conflicted and I don't know what you, as my boyfriend, are. And which is why we aren't in a good relationship at all, and which is why I wish to end it so badly, I'm sorry to break your already dead heart because of it, but I must be out of it as soon as possible before I go insane. Please understand my reasons for leaving you: you are keeping big secrets from me such like your sparkliness, and it's unsettling for me and I can't go on any longer with you. I'm so very sorry.
Not so yours any longer,
Bella Swan, your ex-girlfriend.
And she sent her letter to Edward, signed it with her own personalized handwriting.
My anti fanfic piece, hope you like.