Chibithulhu
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None can resist cuteness.[Mo0:10]
Posts: 2,236
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Post by Chibithulhu on Dec 8, 2011 16:30:35 GMT -8
Yeah, if you're gonna do a trollfic, dive headfirst into the vat of crazysauce. Your failure needs to stand out.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 9, 2011 11:30:38 GMT -8
You guys, could you please take a look at this and say if you think it is a troll or not. I pounced on that story because of the main character's unusual name, and it makes about as much sense as Ariana's works, but I'm not convinced. When I wrote a comment pointing out some of the flaws, instead of being told off rudely, she started asking me for advice. It is just so very hard to give advice to someone who doesn't seem to understand the importance of continuity.
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Post by WolfBloodRei on Dec 9, 2011 11:45:16 GMT -8
Oh god, her sentence structure... But I'm hesitant to call her a troll if she took your constructive crit so well...
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 9, 2011 12:02:47 GMT -8
She did in a way take it well, but she gave me completely nonsensical answers to the questions I asked. She also repeatedly steals passages from another writer, who has a very popular 540+ chapter romance going on. The other writer has told her off and reported her multiple times, but the mods haven't done anything about her. She did another rip-off today. I got suspicious, because her spelling and grammar suddenly got 100% better, so I looked up the latest chapters of her favourite story. Lo and behold, I didn't have to go back more than one chapter. Of course I notified the original author, and I also let the girl know that I'm displeased with what she did. I'm wondering if there is something seriously wrong with this girl, which is why I haven't done a sporking of this.
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Post by Talys Alankil on Dec 9, 2011 12:47:14 GMT -8
I only skimmed the first chapter, but if she's a troll, she's even worse at it than Sammy. I'd rather bet on her being a stupid person. Or maybe she's autistic, just like her apparent self-insert. I know not.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 9, 2011 13:43:48 GMT -8
I'm wondering if she actually is Autistic, which is why I'm trying to handle her with care. She responded to my comment, saying that she wasn't going to copy anymore, and that there was another chapter up. Guess what? There was more copypasta in it. And the worst part is that she hardly even tries to adapt it to her own canon.
There are so many things that don't make sense in the story. It can't really be compared to Sammy at all, because World's Collide has got almost perfect continuity. It's more similar to Ariana's very worst efforts, only without the squick and profanities. Although there are things in it that would be concidered squicky in other ways.
Let me give you some examples:
In the first chapter, Jonathan is Bella's younger brother. Then in the next one, the girl he is in love with is Bella's sister. When I asked the author, she explained that Skirenity isn't Bella's sister, that's a cover for something, and Jonathan is her brother but they have got different parents. What, now?
The headmaster asks Jonathan to take care of Skirenity at school, because he was nice and picked up her books after knocking her over in the corridor. They then start dating. Suddenly Jacob discovers that Jonnythan, who has had a bit of a name change, is actually evil and dates girls to turn them into homeless people. When he is confronted with this, he procedes to beat Skirenity violently, and is put in prison. Skirenity is badly injured, with a twisted stomach and several broken bones, but instead of taking her to the hospital, Jacob cuddles with her in bed all night.
14-year-old Skirenity then gets engaged to Jacob, and they "do it". Edward waltzes in on them, and procedes to chew out Skirenity for being a slut, but has no comment to Jacob. Things then get really weird when Renesmee, who is actually a baby, gets pregnant with Jacob in a future that happens at the same time as the present. At that point I gave up trying to explain the importance of a timeline to the author.
At one point, the family goes to the beach, and accidentally forget about taking Skirenity with them when they go home. Initially, Jacob finds her a couple of hours later, and takes her home. In the next chapter, she is still missing two whole weeks later, and Bella is very devastated. She then goes on to have amazing, mind blowing sex with Edward, possibly another copypaste. Skirenity is somehow still alive at that same beach, where no one has thought of looking for her. Emmett finds her half dead, either at the bottom of the lake, or in the sand. It's being contradicted several times where she actually was.
Renee and Charlie, who was in the previous chapter, suddenly appear after having been missing and thought dead for 14 years.
The worst part about the writing, is probably that the POV is constantly changing, and the same facts are repeated over and over. I tried to tell her that it's not necessary to see everything from everyone's POV, but she wants it that way.
I'm not going to spork this, because I suspect this girl has some actual mental problems, and making fun of her would make me a terrible person. I can't really imagine that someone who is completely normal could mess up a story so badly.
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Post by WolfBloodRei on Dec 9, 2011 14:03:30 GMT -8
^ Well.... If she's not a troll she just broke my brain. As a writer, the logical part of my brain just exploded.
That's a really bad story. But if you feel that you would be doing wrong by sporking it then we'll try and find you something else.
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Post by annoyed on Dec 9, 2011 16:53:14 GMT -8
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 9, 2011 18:19:53 GMT -8
OUCH! That is a troll indeed. Another insane Erin-clone. I've never, never met an actual Christian who was like that.
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Chibithulhu
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None can resist cuteness.[Mo0:10]
Posts: 2,236
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Post by Chibithulhu on Dec 9, 2011 18:34:04 GMT -8
... Oooh! The trolliness! It burnssss! Erin and Tara Gillespie had an unholy Sue-child! RUN FOR IT!
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Post by Talys Alankil on Dec 10, 2011 4:33:10 GMT -8
This is very likely a troll indeed. Fourth Wall instantly broken, and the "evil gods of the greek" and… I'm not sure I'm going to go past the first paragraph. Maybe I will, for the lulz.
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Post by annoyed on Dec 10, 2011 6:53:30 GMT -8
OUCH! That is a troll indeed. Another insane Erin-clone. I've never, never met an actual Christian who was like that. Well there's always the GIFT to consider.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 11, 2011 14:15:41 GMT -8
What is the Gift? I tried Wikipedia, but apparently there are many books and films by that name.
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Post by Talys Alankil on Dec 11, 2011 16:56:18 GMT -8
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Post by annoyed on Dec 11, 2011 18:39:09 GMT -8
Although some facts such him nonchalantly saying "over 9000" and continually confusing John Lennon with Vladimir Lenin even after being repeatedly corrected makes me pretty sure he actually is a troll.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 11, 2011 20:15:34 GMT -8
Goody-good! He was too awful to be real. That would have been sad.
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Post by annoyed on Dec 12, 2011 12:34:21 GMT -8
Still good potential snark bait though
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 12, 2011 13:54:23 GMT -8
Go ahead! Just remember to put it in the non-Twilight fanfiction snark. ;D
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Post by WolfBloodRei on Dec 12, 2011 15:44:57 GMT -8
-Reads the first chapter- ... -Reads the reviews and profile- ... Oh my god... What the hell did I just read? I agree with Chibi, Erin and Tara had a lovechild!
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Post by Anya the Purple on Dec 12, 2011 20:14:43 GMT -8
How do you report people on ff.net? Cuz that needs to be taken down.
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Post by annoyed on Dec 12, 2011 20:43:49 GMT -8
But if it gets taken down we won't be able to make fun of it or read the funny reviews
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Post by WolfBloodRei on Dec 12, 2011 21:00:12 GMT -8
Reporting it won't do anything. It's been reported dozens of times, the staff of FF.NET know about it, but they can't do anything about it. Or won.t
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Dec 13, 2011 4:45:49 GMT -8
I've reported a girl who writes graphic torture fics about Gerard Way and his family. When that doesn't even offend the mods, I doubt that a little fake conservative extremism will. FF usually bans people in bulk once every couple of years, when the cesspool conditions of the place becomes unbearable. In the mean time: Spork! Spork! Spork! Spork!
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Post by WolfBloodRei on Dec 13, 2011 11:35:11 GMT -8
^ And yet they've banned Erin and Ariana several times.
I read the entire thing, the amount of My Immortal references were just too numerous to be coincidence. Now we know what would have happened if Ebony was a member of the Westboro Baptist Church.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Feb 9, 2012 12:12:52 GMT -8
No one has taken a stab at Ariana's last piece of fail yet, so I decided to do it. Both for the sake of completeness, 'cause we shouldn't let any part of her decent into madness go undocumented, and because I'm concidering analyzing a fic by Italian Rose to look for hints that they may really be the same person. I'm not going to waste space by pointing out the grammar and spelling, this fic being what it is. Ron Weasley: Secret Indety dummary: pplease enoy and nhot flame ok? Not flaming. I'm conducting important literary research in the name of Science and the improvement of humankind. Also, I'm giving you attenshun!!!!11 Enjoy the spotlight. ^ my deeveeder on deveint art doesnt ork her. de stentiment is still impolent. I was sitin with mi frens in da griffendoor hale. Jasper? Rosalie? I don't really see them as Gryffs.(dats da place where everybodi eats ok but dey spolt da classes up cos of friction) OK, so only the Gryffindors eat there, then. 2day was sunday co ew had no schole cause it was sunday. i was still werin my schole uniform tho cause dubledmort dint let us were nhything else. I think you can wear pretty much anything you like as soon as class is over. Classic trollfic attire may not be permitted, though. Hard to tell, since no one ever tried to wear it in canon. nyway... i was eatin sum toast nd dtinkin orgne juce. How healthy and normal! it was ten on the moring. if u kno what i men. lolaz. Actually, no I don't know what you mean. The joke was so lame that it went below most people's IQ. i was werin a blak pants nd sum sohes nd a shrit tht was white. den mi fren came over nd shit down beside me. "watcha doin fraggle edward piddo crulyn?" he asked mi. Yeah, this story is told from Edward's POV. I think I'm going to call him Piddo from now."nodden much. we got no class 2day" i sed triumphently. "i gess dat wud be a gud ting but da kidich is cangeled caus of da demortors." "naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwww wali don cry." he sed. Uh-oh. If Wali is there, then so is probably..."no rly assef NooOOOoooOOOoooOOooo! Not him again!!! im not sad" i replyed. he pated me on mi eg. I guess the word for head where Ariana comes from is "egg". "i don even lije kicdihc." i sed. "me either" he sed bak. "dat big blak ball always hits mi in my hed." he sed upsetedly. The bludger is now my favourite character in this story! Go bludger!"omg" u sed sadly. I DID NOT!! den we ate sum more fod and tolked sum mre. it was eic! "did u do ur homwrk?" i assed. "no" he sed. "y nut?" i sed. i was sturdyios. "ur geddin all ass in ur exoms. How... great for him.u hav grat potenshol." i sed. not da was angry wit him rly it war his onw ccoice. "ya i gess.." he sed sady. "no i no" i replyed. he smired and i smilerd. den da bell gong. "Ok i gut 2 go 2 class now" sed Assef. It's still Sunday. He got up out of his shet. You mean his shit, right? Since he came to shit down beside you earlier. i was waken up by a large dog. Sirius! "wat do u hav now" he asled. "i have poshions with proifestor snurp." Haha, that is McGonagle's name in the Norwegian translation! i sed sadly (psnape is a slytherin hed so hes mean 2 us girffendores) Oh, boooo-hoooo. what abut u?" i askled. "o i have car of magrical cretours ith Profesor Hagdi Duldo" he sed. Hagrid's rolling zoo! With unicorns!!! "tbhon i don no why profestor Dudo is teachin he dosn no how 2 tech us jano?" he sed. i smiled and lafed. "ya i kno" i sed. den dis boy camed over 2 me he was also grifendor. "hi" he sed. "hi i sed" "r u goin 2 posions as al?" he ased. You should not go to potions impersonating a boy by the name of Al. Professor Snape will not be impressed that you can brew polyjuice. "im lost" he admirted. i fel bad 4 him evne tho he rly shud hav kno hwir he as gon. he was werin a black dress And we have a cross-dresser. He might turn into a transformer later. an pants with a chokre and sum guylinre nd sims. I'm imagining him with a Sims 3 style puddingface. eh was wakin arond lost 4 hores. Don't thnk you'll find any in Hogwarts. he ahd a giner muckaw on his hed. "im ron welly" he sed. Poor play-doh faced Ron is wearing a dress and a muckaw. This is probably not going to be a good fic for him."godbi" assef sed an den he wen out da window. Assef does not understand simple things like how to use architecture. i knew he was trin to give me an ron moer tim 2gether. (i dink ron is cut not now but later ok bear wit me) Later he will begin to think that Ron is circumcized.den me an ron wen 2 clas. snap was techin da class. he wa techin us how 2 do posions. it wa my vbest subject but he still gve me an f cus im in grifendor. You mean T, don't you? T for TROLL. 2day eh wad a trst on boozers Alcoholics? What a very politically correct topic for potions. (goats stones) i was getin al da angers write. ron was beside me. "AIT" he shouted. "I DON NO UR NAME" he sed shoutin. I'm sure that made Prof. Snape just a little angry."mi nam is fraggle eward pedo Yes! Yes he IS!!! curlyn" i sed. "but u can call me wali" Mkay, so Edward has merged with Wali. Then I guess that makes Ron Bella or something. "ok wali" he sed. den he smild. den i smled. den da class was over. den i wen 2 mi rom. (me assef shreprom) OK, so Hagrid got in trouble for keeping one little spider, while you and Assef are allowed to have a whole flock of sheep in your bedroom?"so did u do it with ron" assef askde. i shoke my hed. Well HELLO?!? In CLASS? In front of Professor Snape???"no not yet hes a misteri" i sed. "like fudge geddit lol u prob wont hhahahahahah" i sed. No, it went below my IQ again, because as far as I remember Fudge is a minister."no i don geddit" he sed. "do u wan 2 ask ron 2 mov in with us" he askd. Can you just move rooms as you like? And if you are in the same year as him, you should be sharing a dorm already."i dunno" i sed. "cum on wali we need anotre fren or da schol wil be clos" he sed saying it. Den i remebred kamal. (ators note: ya he ies in da bok wich is wat dis is baded on in da movi hes not in anymor even da parti) Hogwarts will close if Pedo and Buttsex don't become more sociable, and Kemal is not at the party in the movie. Got it.it wa a luvly day wen we were talion on da gle e gel. kamal was talkin. den assef sed "go away" an den kamal flew in2 da ski. Awww, such a profound and heart warming memory."ok ill ask him" i sed. "gud" he sed. "u must preted 2 be sad lik da ppl i rape" an den assef laffed den stoped bcoz it wasnt at all funny. Wow, a trace of sanity in an Ariana fic!den i wen 2 bed. nex morin i wok up an ron was in da bed with me naked. "HAT" i shouted. "Underpants" would have been a more appropriate exclamation. den i saw dere was stfu everywher. It must have been very quiet then, in a hostile, oppressive way. Assef was stgil aspled. "hi" sed ron "h h hhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii" i sed nervuelsy. he retched out a hand an cuped mi fac. No need to throw up. I understand what it sounded like, but it was only his face."don be nervus" he sed hostily. "i rly lik u wali" he sed. "rly" i sed. "orly orly orly" he sed bac 2 me. Ariana... have a little lesson in net speak: "Orly" is a question, "rly" is the answer."ya i think i mite like u 2" i sed. If his mites like you, I'm sure Madame Pomfrey can give you something to repel them."but ders a prblem" he sed. "watt" i sed. "im da son of mr nigel" he sed. i was shjoke. Who now?"BUT UR GOFIC" i sed. i cudnt beliv it rly. I agree that "Nigel" does not sound very gothic, but who IS he?"i no so is mi da" he sed. den alvin woked up. OK, so Nigel-dad is not a prep after all. And who's Alvin? OK, end of chapter 1.
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Post by Talys Alankil on Feb 10, 2012 8:40:08 GMT -8
^Oh, yeah, I remember seeing that in my FF.net e-mails, but I tend to ignore Ariana's newer stuff anyway. And really… meh. Ariana had little talent to begin with and it's wearing off. Also, wait. There's more than one chapter ? Oh, great.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Feb 10, 2012 10:29:36 GMT -8
Yeah, there are 4 chapters. However, I think Ariana has quit trolling. Maybe she wants to try her luck as a serious ficcer again. We must keep our eyes peeled (am I the only one who think that expression is a little horrifying?) for new cross overs between Twilight and fandoms with tragic children.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Feb 11, 2012 13:54:39 GMT -8
So much for research... In her latest story, Italian-Rose-XXX as good as admits to being Ariana. Assef shows up in it. That probably means that the sharade is over, and this is her way of saying that her trollhood is history. Now I'm hoping that Sammy can get cranking on Worlds Collide.
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Post by Anya the Purple on Feb 16, 2012 21:11:45 GMT -8
^Ugh. All the good trolls are getting so boring.
Good thing there's Brugo to keep us going.
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Tigeranne
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Post by Tigeranne on Feb 17, 2012 3:02:45 GMT -8
Actually, it seems like Italian-Rose has taken to trolling now. Although a little more subtly than her soul-twin.
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